Ch.33: Not Anymore

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Legolas's pov

Tears steam down my cheeks as I run to the stables. I quickly tack the closest horse and ride swiftly into the depths of my once comforting home. But not anymore. I will never see this place again. Ever. There is to much sadness for me to handle. I will never see my father or Glynn again. Or Thallan or Laeroth. I wipe some of my tears with my sleeve and trot farther and farther out of Mirkwood. And surprisingly enough my father hasn't sent the entire guard after me yet. He did seem extremely shocked about my words.

Now I have to consider if I really meant what I said. Do I really hate my Ada? The more I think, the more I realize that I don't hate Thranduil, merely his actions and view on things. He doesn't let me make my own choices. He prevents me from fighting for my own kingdom and from being with those I love. Has he never loved before? I know he said that he had gone through pain before, and he was trying to save me from that pain, but does he really know that all relationships end the way his did? I know my mother passed when I was very young, and I have no memory of her. That must be the pain he is feeling. The pain of loss. The pain that now lies inside me is the pain of rejection. There is a big difference. My Ada knows he will never see his wife again while he's alive. But myself, now Glynn I know she is out there, and that she knows how I feel, and that whenever I see her the pain will increase. Just thinking about her beautiful face makes me cringe.

I am fool for thinking that she would go with me. But did she not say she loved me? If she really did wouldn't she have come with me?

The farther I ride, the more trees disappear and I finally leave the boundary of Mirkwood. Soon all the trees are gone and I am riding alone across a massive field. It feels unnatural to not have to barrier of the branches and leaves above, and the strong trunks of trees around me, standing at the ready to protect my home. My former home. It makes me realize that I am starting to get homesick already. That's not a promising start to my leaving. But I force myself to continue riding.

 Large dark clouds form above. Small droplets of water slowly drip out of the sky. I pull the cowl of my cloak up as protection.  

Whenever it rained in Mirkwood we would hardly notice for the leaves would create a blanket over our heads that would cause nothing to hit the beings that dwell below. It saddens me deeply that I am now thinking of Mirkwoods as though it not longer exists. It doesn't exist for me anymore. And I highly doubt that anyone will miss me. Ada maybe, but he will most likely just be furious.

The sun slowly sets and the rain picks up until it is pouring out of the heavens. Thankfully I can see lights of a nearby village in the distance, hopefully I will find some food and shelter for the night.

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