Blind Love

Kabanata 24

Kabanata 24

"SO, is he the reason?" Tanong sa akin ni Trevor habang nakaupo kami.

Saglit ko siyang nilingon bago pinunasan ang mga luha ko.

"Yes..." I whispered.

Pagkaalis namin ay kaagad akong pumunta sa dating kwarto ko sa mansyon para doon magbihis. Pinahiram ako ni Thallia ng damit at saglit silang umalis para bumalik sa ibaba.

That left me alone with Trevor here at kahit hindi naman siya magtanong ay alam kong alam na niya ang lahat base sa nakita niya kanina.

"Kaya... Kaya ayaw mo akong payagang manligaw dahil sa kanya?" He asked me. Sumulyap naman ako saglit sa kanya at muling tumango.

"I...I don't even think I can accept love from someone else," I answered with a bit of hopelessness and bitterness.

He sighed.

"He's getting married," he informed. I nodded.

"I know," I answered him. "Hindi ko naman nakakalimutan 'yon."

"Then, bakit siya pa rin?" he asked curiously and I couldn't really help but ask it to myself, too.

Bakit siya pa rin?

Pero sinagot lang din ako ng sarili.

"I can't just teach my heart to unlove someone, Trevor," I whispered. "Kung gano'n lang sana kadali edi sana matagal ko nang ginawa."

"How? I mean, paano kayo nagkakilala?" he asked again. I shook my head.

"Mahabang kwento," ayon na lang ang nasabi ko.

I don't want to even think about it. I am exhausted, I am drained, I couldn't even speak well...

"Trevor, if it's okay with you. Can you... Can you leave me alone, please? Gusto ko lang sanang mapag-isa saglit at makapag-isip."

"Of course," he agreed before observing me, concern and worry written on his face. "Will you be alright?"

"Yes, thank you,"

I watched how he walked away and left me alone. Now that I was alone again, I let out a sigh of exasperation.

Now that I am alone again, I felt lost. Nanghihina ako. Hindi ko pa rin makakalimutan ang lahat-lahat.

Masaya na ako, e, pero nakakalungkot lang isipin na hanggang doon lang pala talaga iyon

Na kahit anong gawin ko, hindi na mababago pa ang lahat ng dapat mangyari.

I won't ever change the fact that he was getting married. I won't change his fate, my fate, our fate.

That I couldn't lose him when he wasn't mine in the first place. Wasn't mine to lose.

Maybe our lives go with my favorite myth. Sweet beginning but a bitter end, I anticipated this a long time ago but I wasn't martyr enough to deny it doesn't hurt.

Because it does.

He must go and marry her then I'll stay here and live my life like the way I lived before.

Get used to it, Rhea. Wala ka sa fairytale.

Nakarinig ako ng kalampag sa pintuan ang ang tunog ng isang tahol kaya kaagad akong tumayo at pagkabukas ko aybumungad sa akin si Skye na nag-aabang doon.

"Hi, Skye," I greeted. He barked at mabilis na pumasok sa loob ng kwarto.

I watched him as he jumped on the bed and waited for me. Nang maupo ako sa tabi niya ay kaagad siyang tumakbo papalapit sa akin.