Socially Awkward (Camila/You) Au

33

Not proofread.

Y/N's POV

Was it true I distanced myself a little from Camila? Yes.

Was it true I pretended to be busy whenever she wanted to come over? Yes.

Was it true she called my parents just so she could talk to me? Yes.

Have we talked about college yet? No.

Is she mad at me? Yes, so fucking mad.

She's so mad she even sent Ally, Dinah, Lauren and Normani to my house.

"Girl, you have some explaining to do," Dinah growled once I opened the door.

Normani stood there looking ready to curse me out with every curse word in the world, Lauren looked about ready to beat the shit out of me while screaming things in Spanish at me, and Ally just looked disappointed which made me feel really bad about myself.

Dinah pushed past me, purposely nudging my shoulder on the way, Normani glared me down, Lauren couldn't even look at me and Ally shook her head at me.

I closed the front door before making my way into the lounge room to see the girls already sitting down, I took a seat that was the furthest away from them and waited for one of them to speak up.

No one did.

"Uh...how is she?" I timidly spoke.

"How is she? How is she!?" Dinah mocked me in anger, "you've got to be kidding me Y/N."

"If you weren't ignoring her, you would know," Lauren bitterly spat.

Yup, I deserved that.

"I'm not really ignoring her, it's more of-"

"Are you serious? You've declined all her calls, you turned her down every time she asked to hang out, you're being a blunt asshole to her and she doesn't know why she's being treated like this," Normani made strong pointing gestures at me just to emphasise her fury.

"Guys if we want answers, we need to talk it out  like civil people," Ally's mother side came out.

"Civil!? No, I'm just about done with Camila moping around about how her girlfriend is blowing her off, I'm done with watching Camila look at her phone anxiously waiting for her supposed 'girlfriend' to call her back! She's hurt Ally! Camila is hurting because she doesn't why Y/N won't talk to her anymore!" I could see Dinah was close to giving me a poly beatdown.

I looked down feeling disappointed in myself, I was causing Camila pain and I wasn't doing anything about it.

"C'mon Y/N, tell us why. Give us some answers," Ally spoke gently to me.

"I'm scared," I softly spoke.

"Scared of what?" Mani scoffed.

"Scared that I've become so dependent on her," I breathed out.

"What do you mean?" Ally asked.

"I was the most independent person I knew.
Before her it was just me. I did everything myself, I made myself happy, I counted on myself to get things done, I didn't need someone to cuddle with, I felt content with myself."

"The thought of Camila being here in Miami while I'm over there in New York doesn't sit well with me. You should've felt the pain I felt just imagining that amount of distance between us. I'm afraid I lost my independence, I'm afraid that once we're that far from each other I'll lose my mind, I didn't need a human's presence before to keep me sane, and suddenly now I do, do you know how much that worries me?" I finally looked up to see them listening as their features became softer.

"What happens when Camila dies? What am I going to do? How am I going to cope? I don't fucking know! I can't even imagine living in a different state from her! And it's just bullshit! I don't need no human to keep me happy, but I need Camila? I don't understand that," I finally gave them what they wanted, the answer.

It was silent for a few minutes since no one knew what to say.

"So you've been separating yourself from Camila to try and gain your independence back?" Lauren asked. I weakly nodded my head yes to answer.

"And because I don't want to know which college she applied for," I mumbled loud enough for them to hear.

"You said something about going to New York, what college are you going to?" Normani asked with her eyebrows furrowed.

"Berklee College of Music," I answered with a sigh, "I got offered a scholarship, they've had their eyes on me since the start of junior year, Mr. K was a big help, he sent them videos of my performances in class and sent them demos of my songs with the boys."

"Wow, that's massive Y/N," Ally let her tough mother demeanour drop and gave me an impressed smile.

"I'm actually very proud of you Y/N," Dinah smiled at me, "but I'm still pissed," she went back to glaring at me.

"Imma let my anger slide for a minute," Normani sighed, "proud of you girl, you deserve it," she hollered.

"Fuck you, you hurt Camz," Lauren was deadset on making me feel guilty.

"We still have another month till we find out our colleges," Ally sighed.

All four of them then began lecturing me about how to handle these situations and how to make Camila happy again, which was texting her. They all left an hour later and didn't forget to threaten me about ever hurting Camila again.

I got comfy under my covers and took a big breath before picking up my phone and texting Camila.

Me:
Hey

Camila:
Seriously?

Me:
I can explain why I distance myself from you

Camila:
Goodnight

Me:
No don't. Camila, I'm sorry, I'll tell you everything

Camila:
I don't want to hear it

Me:
Are you free tomorrow? We can meet up and I'll answer questions

Camila:
Busy

Yeah, that one I deserved.

Me:
Oh okay

Camila:
Yh, gn

Me:
I just want to talk

Camila:
Oh so now you want to talk?

Camila:
Lol okay

Me:
Camila...

Camila:
Goodnight, don't contact me for the next few days too

Me:
It's almost Christmas, I got you a gift
[read: 9:30pm]

I groaned and set my phone on my bedside table.

I'm going to need the girls help for this one.

==
A/n
I don't know how to write angst, felt like I needed to spice this book up a little because I'm pretty sure it's flopping.

Thanks for the support and love fam!

Stay stage homies <3