You Know Nothing || Cersei Lannister (GxG)

XLII.

Sorry for the late update, loves😙 I was reeling from the new episode. Damn, Lena deserves an emmy for the Ellaria/Cersei scene.

   "You can come out from behind that pillar, you know, they're gone." I heard Cersei say, and I hesitated, before slowly stepping out of the shadows.

"I just... wasn't sure if you wanted to see me..."

"Come here, please." She said, her voice cracking as a tear rolled down her cheek. I came and stood by her side as she wept quietly, and suddenly she collapsed into my embrace, showing me the vulnerable part of herself she hadn't dared show her child, or her father.

"It's going to be alright." I told her, pressing a to her forehead. I held her frail body as it heaved dry sobs, her hands grabbing at the back of my shirt and her tears wetting my skin. "I promise."

"No, no it isn't." She sobbed, her voice slightly muffled. "It's never going to be okay. I've made too many mistakes and now the gods are punishing me."

"Love, it isn't your fault." I told her, nuzzling my face into her blonde hair. "There was nothing you could do." I looked at the body of the King, stiff and cold, with painted rocks covering his eyes. The crown rested on his head and so did his sword in his hands, crossed over his chest. The sight made me sick, but I knew that things wouldn't have gotten any better.

"I could've stopped it." She mumbled. "I knew- Tyrion..."

"What did Tyrion say?" I asked, and she straightened herself the slightest bit, resting her chin on my shoulder. My arms held tightly around the small of her back, and her voice was sad and lost in my ear.

"He said that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, he would make the joy turn to ashes in my mouth."

I was frankly taken aback. I knew that Cersei and Tyrion shared a vague dislike of each other, but I had never knew it was this bad. I didn't assume it was this bad, and she had never told me anything about her past to prove otherwise.

"We'll have a trial." I told her. "And we'll get to the truth of what happened. I'm sure Tyrion would-"

"I don't want a trial." She seethed, gripping fistfuls of my shirt near the small of my back. "I want him to pay now."

"Love, look at me." I told her. "Look at me." She did, hesitantly, her eyes red and puffy as she chewed on her bottom lip. I pressed a brief kiss to her forehead and looked deeply into her watery green eyes. "Tell me about Joff. Tell me all the things you love about him, tell me how you felt when he was born. Tell me everything."

She let out a shaky breath and nodded. "Before I named Myrcella, he was all I had. And all I ever wanted. He had golden hair, and the brightest blue eyes..."

"What happened to him?" I asked softly, and she shook her head, turning around to look at his empty face.

"I don't know... maybe... they used to say that every time a Targaryen was born, the gods flipped a coin. And I guess... that's what happened. Jaime and I used to tell ourselves that they would wed brothers and sisters for generations to keep the bloodline pure, so... it was okay. But it wasn't. Myrcella and Tommen are both good children, sensitive and kind. But Joffrey... he wasn't. He wasn't the type to share his toys, and he enjoyed hurting small animals, but he was mine."

"I wish I could say I understood." I held her hand and she leaned back on my chest.

"I tried to raise him right, but he only did what he wanted. And that just grew worse when I put a crown on his head."