You Know Nothing || Cersei Lannister (GxG)

LXI.

Hey! It's been awhile! 

   It had been a couple months of worry, wine, and loneliness before Cersei had her child. The second I heard she was in labor, I jumped from my book on Stark history and ran to the dungeons.

"Excuse me, my lady, but you can't-" a septa put her hand on my shoulder as I drifted towards the screams and grunts of pain and frustration.

"That's my sister in law giving birth in there. The baby is to be given to me until she has her trial, I have arranged it with the High Sparrow." I pushed past the woman and entered the cell, where Cersei was stretched on a cot, her legs propped open.

"Paityn!" She exclaimed when she saw me, grabbing for my hand.

"I'm here, Cersei." I whispered, scanning the room for septas/sparrows, and relieved that I only found some scattered handmaids and the Mountain.

"Paityn, it hurts." She gasped as I brushed away some stray hair that stuck her face with sweat.

"Qyburn!" I called as I spotted him roaming outside the door. "Qyburn!"

"Yes, my lady?" He asked, bowing his head politely. Cersei cried out again, digging her fingernails into my forearm.

"Did you give her anything for the pain?" I winced, thinking of asking for a little bit of whatever he could spare as well.

"I did, my lady." Qyburn nodded.

"Then why is she still in pain?" I asked loudly, over Cersei's loud breathing and the beating of her heart.

"I'm giving birth, Paityn!" She exclaimed. "There is a baby trying to come out of my cunt, of course I'm going to be in pain!"

"Shh, shh, my sweet." I pressed my lips to her damp brow. "I know it hurts, but you're giving birth. You've created a life, and you're bringing it into the world."
"You're right. You're right." She sighed, leaning her head back on the stiff quilt. "Thank you for being here, Paityn. I couldn't have done this without you."

"Be calm, my love, you haven't had the child yet," I chuckled, and she smiled painfully.

"It's going to be a girl." She said after a few moments of comfortable silence, her chest heaving quickly up and down.

"How do you know?"

"I can feel it. Not to mention." She smiled softly. "When I was young, my mother told me that she knew I was a girl because of how bad it hurt. How much I kicked."

"Well, I'm sure that had nothing to do with you being a Lannister, now, did it?" I raised an eyebrow, and Cersei rolled her eyes.

"Who knows? I was a stubborn kid. About as self-preserving as I am now."

"I think you've changed." I told her, brushing the side of her hand with my thumb. "For the better, of course. You're more caring now. The Cersei I didn't know would have threatened or fucked her way to the top."
"What makes you think I wouldn't still do that?" She asked, making a teasing biting motion in the air.

"You're pushing a living being out your cunt, I don't think sex anytime soon is such a great idea." I said, shrugging nonchalantly.

"Oh yeah? Who's gonna stop me? As soon as this baby is out, I'm going to drink, and I'm going to fuck-"

"Whatever you want, princess," I chuckled as her face contorted, the rest of her body writhing in silent pain. She grasped my hand.

"That's Queen to you, Stark." She said, and screamed. "I think the baby is coming."

"Let's hope so, so I can see her beautiful face."

"She will be beautiful, won't she?" Cersei asked. "And she'll grow up with you as a mother, so she'll be smart as well, passionate and kind."

"Do you think she'll be... perverted like us?"
"You think we're perverted?"

"Well..." I hesitated. How to answer a question such as this. It wasn't so much of what I believed, really. It was so much of what others thought. "You know, people say-"

"Who gives a rat's ass what people say?" Cersei asked, taken aback. "Oh, you've disappointed me, Paityn." She said, tasting the words, as if they were a bitter wine. "I thought you of all people would be different, but you're just like my brother."
"How dare you compare me to the father of your child?" I asked, squinting at her.

"Don't say that, Paityn, you know I didn't want it." Her voice dropped, and I regretted what I had said.
"You're right, forgive me," I bowed my head, and she sighed, the veins in her neck straining against her pale skin. "I shouldn't have..."

"We can talk about this later, just... hold my hand."

The rest of the labor was silent. Cersei didn't cry out once. The next bout of crying that was heard was the wailing of a babe.

Then, suddenly, with the child nestled in my arms, everything seemed worth it.

"Look, Cersei." I said softly, and she smiled. I hadn't seen her smile that big in a long time. "She's the spitting image of you."

"I would hope so. Unless she was a boy. Oh, check and make sure, will you?"

"She's a girl, I swear it." I wrapped the child in a blanket and relished the feeling of motherhood. I was sure that it wouldn't last. As soon as she started crying, I would be in trouble.

"What shall her second name be, darling?" Cersei asked, allowing her legs to fall as she cradled the young thing.

"Well, since we're embracing the idea of motherly names, how do you feel about Joanna?" I raised my eyebrows, and Cersei closed her eyes.I noted a small tear that trickled down her cheek.

"Catelyn Joanna Lannister-Stark. It's perfect. Just like her."

"Everything we never were."