Alice's story

Bete Noire

"He's not an American Naval officer?" Ducky questions Gerald while him and I walk into the autopsy at night.

"They said he was a Royal Navy Commander," Gerald informs him.

"Well, which Navy, Gerald? There are several of them."

"I assume British, Doc."

"The Swedes, the Norwegians, Aussies, Kiwis, Saudis," I say with thinking them up on the spot before adding, "They all have Royal Navies."

"Well, the EMT only said that the Embassy told them to bring him to NCIS for autopsy."

"Which Embassy?" Ducky inquires of Gerald while walking over to the body bag.

"Israeli."

"Israeli?" Ducky and I ask him together in confusion.

"That's what they said."

"Hmm. Why on earth would the Israeli Embassy send us a foreign naval officer?" Ducky asks in confusion.

"Well that's what I ask the EMT that delivered the body, but they didn't know either."

"He calls me down here in the middle of the night, doesn't know which Navy. Gerald, what does this look like?" Ducky complains while going over to his drawers and opens them.

"Uh... one of my gloves."

"What's it doing in my drawer?"

"I'm sorry, doc, I must have put your gloves in my drawer. I'll get it."

"No, I'll do it. Ah, Gerald, unzip that body bag and find out with which Navy our guest sailed," Ducky orders making Gerald and I walk over to the bag and unzip it but both of us freeze when we see what is in the bag. "Don't recognize the uniform. I'm not surprised. The Royal Navies of the world wear almost identical uniforms. In fact, during World War Two, British Naval Officer whose ships went down in the channel, passed themselves off in Antwerp as German submariners who," Ducky rambles while coming back over to us and saying, "Good god."

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"Shut off the lights," Ari, the unknown naval officer, orders of us with a very strong Israeli accent while pointing a gun out us, "And return. Is the video camera on?"

"Sorry, doc," Gerald whispers to Duck when Ari shots the camera out.

"That's all right, Gerald. I looked at it too," Ducky whispers back to him while hiding me behind his body as much as possible.

"How do you alert visitors when conducting infectious autopsy?" Ari inquires of us while pointing the gun out us still.

"We hang a decomposing body in the corridor," Ducky and I answer at the same time.

"A sense of humour under duress – that's an admirable quality, Doctor, ma'am. However, when I ask a question, I want a truthful and immediate answer. So every time you lie or I suspect you lie, I will put a nine millimetre, hollow point slug into one of your assistant's ball and socket joints. If you doubt me, I can demonstrate."

"That won't be necessary. May I make a request?" Ducky jumps in while stepping in front of both Gerald and myself.

"You would rather I put the slug in you?"

"Yes."

"I can't oblige. How do you alert people to infectious autopsies?"

"A lit red sign in the corridor."