no savior.

no liquor

Dear Kaylie Jane,

     I remember the first time I saw you. The first time we kissed. The first time we made love. 

                I don't want to forget... But maybe I should...

KJ's POV

How long can you stalk someone before they notice? A few days? A month?

I had no right to be watching her. But I couldn't stop myself. 

I told Beck I didn't want to talk to Layne, which was true, but I couldn't help but find myself back at that same bar time and time again, just watching her. She'd come through sometimes by herself, other times with the same Latina girl from that night with Beck. I didn't want to get back into a relationship with her, but I wanted to make sure she was okay.

Then again I didn't want to admit why to myself why she wouldn't be.

Besides, I wasn't talking to her. Just watching.

I'm pulled from my thoughts as shouting starts up. Then I realize the shouting is directed at me.

"So when are you gonna stop staring at me and come over and say hi!" she yells across the room at me.

So much for not talking to her....

My face heats and I suddenly become extra interested in my drink. "Hey."

I look up and she's standing next to me at my booth. I nod, unable to speak. Has she always been this beautiful?  I haven't seen her up close in years. Her warm eyes glisten with mischief. Her blonde hair spills down her back, not a strand out of place, and she smirks, clearly amused at my state of shock.

"Shy, aren't you?" she slides into my booth without permission, "How about buying me a drink? You drink, right?"

"This is a virgin," my mouth says, even though I didn't okay it to do so, "No liquor."

"Cute," she waves down the barkeep, "I'll have a coke and rum. On her please."

She turns back to me, and leans in close, "I'm a lot of things... But a virgin is not one."

I know. I think to myself. I'm the one with your virginity.

"Really? You're not gonna say anything to that?" she observes me, like I'm prey and she's a predator, ready to rip out my throat. Only I'm doing terrible on my end because I'd totally let it happen and wouldn't give a damn. Say something you look stupid right now, KJ.

I clear my throat, "I said the drink was virgin... Nothing to be said about the drinker."

"Oh! She speaks!" she laughs, "And she speaks with the sexiest of voices." She laughs some more and it sends shivers through me, as it sounds exactly as I remember, "Can I have a name?"

"Can you?" I relax a little, trying to be more myself, "Jane," I reply.

"Jane?" she says it again slowly, testing it on her lips, "Like Jane Doe? Or like Kaylie Jane?"

Bitch, it might be. My ever-present smirk falters, before I catch it, "Is it?"

"We know each other don't we?" she presses.

"No I don't thinks so," I lie. She pulls out a notebook, "Yes we do." She opens it, revealing a photo of us together as kids, lips locked. I look away. It hurts to look at it.

"Stop lying," she slides me the photo, "Look at it. That's you I'm kissing isn't it? You've been here everyday for two weeks watching me. Why?"

"Because you're beautiful," The first honest words in awhile fall from my lips, "And I don't deserve to look at you, so I do it in secret."