Whispers In The Dark

Victoria

Victoria

“I’m going to kill you!” I shrieked, chasing Riley around her car.

We were at a deadlock; her on one side, me on the other.

“I’m sorry!” she cried. “I didn’t know he would tell Robin, I swear!”

“Why would you tell him!?”

“He promised he wouldn’t tell anyone! And he’s in our little group thing, he deserves to know!”

“It’s not your secret, Riley! No one deserves to know except for me!” I seethed. Whether or not I hurt myself was none of their damn business.

“This isn’t good for you, Victoria! You think it’s helping and making things better, but it’s not!” she argued.

“You don’t know anything,” I hissed.

“I know that this is only going to get worse. You thought you could control it, didn’t you?” Her lip quivered. “You can’t, Victoria. I know it as well as you. They just keep getting bigger, and deeper, and they’re covering more and more and more. I’ve seen them, Victoria. What are you going to do if your parents see them?”

I gritted my teeth. “Nothing. They won’t care.”

She sighed. “Yes, they will. Just because they fight over dumb shit doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you.”

“You. Don’t. Know. Shit.” I growled.

“Please don’t keep doing this,” she begged.

“Shut up!” I tugged at my hair, frustration clogging my head. “I can do whatever I want!”

Her eyes were glassy. She whispered, “If you don’t stop, I’ll tell somebody.”

Her words wrapped their meaty hands around my neck and squeezed. I was suffocating. Those words had the power to kill me, I knew it. “You’re lying.”

She shook her head and held a fist to her lips as if to hold back a sob. “I’m not.”

I could feel my hands shake. I rubbed them against my jeans, hoping that it would stop it. It didn’t. My lips decided to join the party. I was a quivering mess. “I told you that you didn’t get it. If you did, you wouldn’t say that.”

“I’ve been where you are,” she said. “My parents fought, too. I know, it sucks.”

“That’s different,” I mumbled.

Her jaw clenched. “Why? Because my brother killed himself?”

I didn’t answer.

“It’s all the same, Victoria. You’re cutting yourself, and so did he. Your parents are thinking of getting a divorce, and so did mine. Just don’t do this, please. You’ll be fine, I swear, just not like this.”

My stomach was doing somersaults and the shaking refused to cease. “Don’t feed me that shit,” I warned. “Don’t start with the “it’s only temporary” and “it gets better” bullshit, because that only happens in the movies. You didn’t get through it, did you?” I laughed, but it was sardonic, and it felt like shattered glass in my mouth. “Here you are, spouting all that “it gets better” crap, but look at where you are! You’re no better than where I am, Riley. You’ve got a dead brother and a closet full of alcohol. Your dad doesn’t seem to be in the picture much, and from what I’ve seen, it looks like you’ve got a bit of a drug problem on the side. Your ex-boyfriend’s an obsessed bastard, and I’ve figured out by now that he’s the one who’s been leaving you daisies everywhere. I’ve seen the bottles, you have empty bottles of Insomnia medication and anti-depressants in your room. Your mom left and you two can’t even speak anymore, and there are more than a few rumors going around about you right now since you ditched the queen bitches. So, you should definitely not be telling me “it gets better”. Maybe that’s what helps you sleep at night, but it’s probably time you wake up.”

Riley was crying. The sight alone made my heart clench. My mouth tasted like venom and my stomach felt like it was trying to digest gasoline. “Sorry” caught in my throat. Instead, the only thing that came out was, “Riley…”

She ran in the other direction, leaving her car behind. Eventually, when I couldn’t see her, I crawled into her backseat and cried.

Neither of us went to school that day.