The Regret(Editing)

Worry

The past few days has been going quite well. I got my paperwork done, so there was no pile up. The boys were doing well with their routines since Alex has been a great help, and Alex and Hobi were doing well with his mixtape. I was feeling rather excited and relieved that things were going as planned so my mind hasn't been clouded with constant worrying.

I look up at the clock on the wall, it was 4:30pm and I needed to take a break telling my the sound of my stomach growling. I get up from my seat grab the lunches, that I made night before, from the mini fridge beside me, and went to the dance studio. As soon as I arrive I knock on the door and I hear Hobi yelling to come in. I step in and see Alex and Hobi seated together in front of the digital audio workstation working on beats. Hobi turns around and greet me with a warm smile that always lights my world.

"Hey Jagi! I'm going on break and wanted to stop by and give you your lunch as I usually do." I hand him the boxed lunch waiting in anticipation to see if he knows what I made. He opens the boxed lunch and jumps with excitement when he sees that I made him his favorite lunch, ttoekboki, with kimchi fried rice.

"Thank you Jagiya! I'll eat this right now!" he places the lunch on the mini table that was next to him and preps his table to start eating.

"What about you Alex? Have you taken any breaks?" I ask 

"Oh no I'm fine! I'll take it later. But thank you anyways" She says as she looks at Hobi down the food that I just gave him. Her face showed a look of astonishment and holds back a laugh, trying to take in at how Hobi can eat like it's his last meal.

"Don't worry about him" I chuckle. "The boys love shove food down their throats. You'll get used to their table manners. Remember feel free to take any breaks. We're pretty much carefree at this company so don't feel intimated" I say with a smile.

"Thank you so much. I've only been here for a couple of days and you're all really thoughtful and welcoming.I appreciate it!"

"No problem at all. Let me or PD know if Hobi becomes a handful" I got closer to her and whispered to her. "He can be stubborn sometimes" I pat him on the head playfully

"Not all the time Jagi!" He says with his mouth full. "Oh and the mixtape is going great. I'm looking forward to the finished product!"

"Eww Hobi don't talk with you mouth full. I didn't marry you so that you can shower me with your chewed up food on a daily basis" I grab his face and use my hands to close his mouth so that he has no choice but to chew with his mouth closed. He continues to fight back back by using his free hands to tickle me and we're both on the floor.

"You two are so cute. Yeah he's very poetic. Words just roll out of his mouth. He's truly amazing" she smiles at me and Hobi.

Hobi helps me up from the floor and I wipe away any crumbs or particles off of me.

"I know he his. Well I should get going before my break ends. Keep up the good work you two" I say as I leave the sudio.

"Thanks Jagiya. I'll come upstairs and check on you" Hobi yells out

I head to the elevator when I hear heavy footsteps down the hall. I turn to see Namjoon running up to me panting. He stops right in front of me, kneeling down to catch his breathe while trying to say something.

"What's the rush Namjoon?" I ask in a worried tone and fan him with my one free hand

"Noona, I have some lyrics from out album that needs reproof. I could do it but I'm preoccupied at the moment. You think you can do this for me please?"

" I can see. Yeah sure" He hands me two sheets of paper that had Korean to English translations. I scan the papers for a few seconds and look up at Namjoon.

"I'll have it done by then end of this week" I nod and smile

"Thanks noona!" He holds his chest as sign of great relieve

I was about to walk away when Namjoon clears his throat and calls me name.

'Wait Y/N noona...I...ugh.I wanted to ask you something. I mean I know where all like family and we get on each others nerves sometimes but....Have you noticed anything strange about Tae"?

I took a step back to think about his question. I wasn't bothered by it but I was glad I was not the only one noticing his behavior for the past days, in fact the last seven months. I didn't think his behavior was not too bad where he's psychically hurting himself. But I didn't want to read too much into it and cause paranoia so I just told him that I noticed and thought he was just acting out his exhaustion.

"Well I have noticed but it's nothing new, right. Besides he's always the one making new friends in bathrooms right?" I say trying to bring some humor into the situation.

"Hmm, you're right. He's always been that way. Perhaps I've been reading him wrong. Sorry for asking that. I see you're headed to lunch so I won't hold you up." He gives me a hug and says he'll see me later and runs back down the hall. 

I stepped into the elevator and ride up to the cafeteria. Thoughts started forming in my head. I start to think about the boys and all of their hardships. In fact I worry about all of them everyday. I worry about thier health, emotional well being while trying to live a decent life being one of the greatest kpop group known thought the entire world. Hobi usually doesn't act out his anger in front of me or the boys, so he secludes himself and dances till his body gives out. It hurts me when he does this but it's his way of relieving stress. Tae is the same only he stays quiet and writes, sings to himself or goes to me to talk. Ever since his grandmother passed away I can't help but to keep an eye on him. Who knows what's going through his mind. I was pretty much like and older sister to the boys,al though Jin is older than me. They sometimes go to me when help is ever needed. Till this day, just being around them and Hobi especially makes my work much more enjoyable and meaningful.

I arrived to my destination d stepped out the elevator and took a left and walked a few steps to the cafeteria. It wasn't crowded with people this time so it was enough for me to eat peacefully. Most days I stay in the office to eat or eat at the dance studio to watch the boys practice. The company isn't strict but I still have the mentality of having to eat in a break room, as if I was still working at a typical American job. I took a seat right next to the huge clear glass window, where I usually sat, t have a full view of the city. I'm always mesmerized by the city's beauty and tranquility; the lights, the sky, and see people commuting. I opened up my boxed lunch and took my first bite of food I had today. I instantly felt relieved that I finally had food in my stomach since the hunger pains I had in the office were so unbearable.

As I was eating, a figure heads to my table and sits down in front of me. I was getting a bit anxious and slightly irritated that this person decides to sit right in front of me, when there were plenty of other available seats. Usually I don't say anything at all when situations like this happens because I don't want to be seen as rude. I look up only to find out that it was...