The Regret(Editing)

I Love You

It's been a while since I've been on an 18 hour flight and I was starting to feel the jet lack kick in. My body ached, my neck was sore from laying on on side throughout the flight, and I couldn't sleep due to my thoughts about signing the divorce papers. In my mind I knew he had signed it but in my heart I secretly didn't want him to. It was 7pm, the bright lights of LA flashed before my eyes. We made a smooth and steady landing to LAX and the flight attends had assisted all of us in gathering our belongings. I head to the luggage pickup and got my luggage and head out the airport. The bittersweet smell of LA filled my nose, it was almost nostalgic...painfully nostalgic. I hail down a taxi and gave him the address to my apartment, which was about a 45 minute drive. I get in the back sit and we head towards the highway.  

I look out the window, admiring and reminiscing the long commutes from school to work. The days when I would spend hours upon hours on my business studies all while trying to maintain a full time job. And then I remembered BTS and how I got into their music. I remember crying for missing out on their free concerts when BTS were just rookies and had a very small fan base. And then I remember Hobi. He was shy but very happy and energetic. His personality pretty much dominated when he was around people he felt comfortable with.

It was really hard for me balancing school and work and how I wanted to fulfill that dream of working in music and business. I had support from my parents and the few friends I had from childhood and college, but it was very limited. I graduated from my 4 year university 8 months after BTS's debut and I applied for paid internships at small music companies to help me get experience and to eventually intern for bigger companies. After months and months of hard work I was contacted by Bang PD through a phone interview and was asked if I wanted to intern as a translator and help promote BTS. I immediately said yes and thanked him for the opportunity and hung up. I jumping up and down on my couch, calling my parents and friends about the exciting news and started two weeks later. I went on a quick trip to Korea to meet the boys and Bang PD and get to work with them a little bit before they came to America to stay for half a year. 

When I first met the boys I was nervous, my mind was spiraling and I was anxious about my fluency in the Korean language. I only took Korean for two years but was still not confident in my ability. Luckily, Namjoon was fluent in English and was kind enough to tutor me for two weeks before I had to return to America. We would go to the old dance studio and he would tutor me while the boys practiced. We eventually started to become best friends the more we hung out That's where I met Hobi. I was met with a pair of beautiful, dark brown eyes that I could stare at for days. His eyes sparkled every time I looked at him. He smiled back at me shyly when he noticed that I caught him staring at me and he looked away in embarrassment and resumed to practicing.

I was on my way to meet the boys and their managers in Hollywood to pass out flyers for their free concerts. I was paired with Hobi rather than Namjoon this time, which made me twice as nervous because his English was a little difficult to understand and my Korean was still lacking. We were lucky that we had about 100 people taking our flyers and asking who BTS was or what is Kpop. I was a bit nervous telling people about kpop or who bts was because I was afraid I would be giving the wrong information or be judgmental. Hobi steps in and using the English he knew, gives them a better explanation, and they gladly took the flyers and said they would come.

After two hours of passing out flyers, we are called in to meet with the boys to have lunch at their dorm. We started walking down the street of Hollywood and Highland when I accidentally dropped a stack of flyers on the ground and I quickly bend down to grab them.

"Oh no! Why me?" I whine with embrassment

Hobi comes over and bends down and helps me gather they flyers. I felt him staring at me but I pretended to not notice. I was about to reach the last flyer until Hobi and I bump hands and I nervously look at him and stuttered an apology.