Chapter 20: "I have to."

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"MIKE, GET UP! NOW!" Nancy yells at me that Monday. "IT'S ALMOST 7:00!"

I fall out of my bed in panic. "WHAT!?"

My screeches of fear and worry are followed by Nancy laughing her ass off.

"I kid. It's almost 6:15. Get your butt up." She says as she leaves, not bothering to close my door. (A/N: I HATE THAT SM)

"Oh, hilarious Nance! 10 out of 10!" I yell exasperated as I pull open my dresser and get out some jeans.

After pulling on a random shirt on the floor,(don't worry, I sniffed it) I reluctantly get myself out my door, and into a chair at the kitchen table.

Yawning, I pile the fresh scrambled eggs Mom has on the table onto my plate and dig in. I fight against sleep as I tell my parents I have to meet up with the party.

I trudge out the front door and meet up with Lucas. I yawn out a weak hello and we set off toward Dustin's.

"Hey ladies," Dustin joins us on our way to Will's.

We ride in silence, and to me, that's the best part. We've built the kind of friendship where if no one's talking, it's not awkward. No one feels like they have to make small talk. It's one of the things I love most about our party.

Will greets us with a smile and we all head to Y/N's. She waves at us and rides down her driveway, tagging behind Dustin. We all try to rub the sleep from our eyes as we ride to school.

The bike rack behind the school is empty as always. The party and I shove our bikes in it and head inside our favorite place.

"Thank God we have science first...I really don't think I can take any teacher's bullshit this early in the morning, but Mr. Clarke is pretty awesome." Y/N says as we all walk down the hall together.

"Yeah," I smile at her. "We'll meet you there?" I say to Dustin, Lucas, and Will.

They all agree as they turn down different hallways toward their lockers.

When Y/N and I get to our lockers, we effortlessly open them and take out our books for science.

"Okay," she sighs. "Let's go."

I groan in protest. "I'm tired." I whine.

Just then the bell rings.

"So am I," she agrees. "But we have to."

When I don't make any attempt to move, she sighs again and takes me by the upper wrist, forcing me into class.

"Nooooooooooo." I complain again, ignoring the all too familiar feeling in my stomach and cheeks.

"Yeeeessssss." She replies, dragging me through the hall.

We trudge to Mr. Clarke's room together, rather reluctantly. Mr. Clarke is just closing the door when we arrive.

"Get in you two, you're lucky I don't count you as late." He says.

"Sorry Mr. Clarke." Y/N mumbles as she takes her seat in between Will and me.

Then he begins his lesson on atoms.

That day as we were riding home, we ride to Y/N's first as usual, then we start heading to my house.

When we arrive, I skid to a stop and wave goodbye to the boys. Instead of doing the same back, they all give each other an 'okay, it's go-time' nod.

"Mike, we need to talk." Lucas says boldly.

"Uhm, what for?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows.

"Not to be invasive or anything, but," Dustin continues, taking a breath. "We know you like Y/N. Don't deny it. We're not blind you know."

Shit.

"Wha-" I start, the blood rushing to my cheeks.

"Tell her." Will finishes as they begin to ride away.

"Guys, I don't!" I try to yell to them.

"Don't deny it, Mike! Love's-a-callin!" Lucas shouts without looking back.

Sighing to myself, I call to them once more. "Just don't tell anyone, okay?"

"Knew it!" Dustin says, all the way down the street. "You're in love, Wheeler!" He finishes, his voice echoing through the streets.

I slowly roll my bike into the garage. Well motherfucking shit. Is it that obvious?

Plopping down on my bed, I wonder if she knows too. My thoughts race a mile a minute. For a brief moment, I wonder if they'll tell her, but the thought
is dismissed as quickly as it came. They would never.

After a long time sitting on my bed with a pillow over my head, I decide they're right.
But what's the point? You're twelve. Plus it's not like she'll avoid me forever after this. Okay wow this actually sucks so much. U g h. F e e l i n g s. They suck a lot.

Okay. So I've come to the decision to tell her. Don't ask me why exactly. I'm gonna put it all on the line. Even if she doesn't like me back, even if she'll never talk to me again, I just need her to know. I have to tell her, I have to.

But how?

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