Chapter 7

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CONTINUED OF CHAPTER 6 AGAIN I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING STUPID AND FORGETTING TO SAVE.

I got back to talking to everyone again. They claimed I 'came back from the dead' trying to cheer me up but it only semi worked. I still thought of Harry all the time.

The second month I was too depressed to waste my energy partying. I liked the way drugs, alcohol, and sex made me fee but I didn't like them so it was easy to let go of that knowing I couldn't afford  to go to rehab. I cried like every day which was upsetting and just ended in me stuffing my face with unhealthy food.

I managed to get a job at the four story Forever 21 which was like shopping every day but leaving empty handed. It gave me something else to try to get my mind off of Harry but I still thought of him no matter what. I started classes in August and learning surprisingly turned my focus away from Harry for once.

My life was coming back together but it was still nothing without Harry in it. The third month was like any other college girl's heartbreak on top of school work and a job. Brandon was really my only escape still from month one. We were still best friends but like best friends with benefits now too.

As of now I'm sitting at the park a few blocks away from campus eating ice cream because I'm sad and I'm lonely. It's the middle of September and it's starting to get cold again so I can finally have an excuse to wear sweatpants all the time even though I do it anyway disregarding the temperature.

Rayne, Gemma, and Eleanor are all back in school so it's just One Direction and5SOS on the tour bus now. After the first month of my breakup was when i started talking to the girls again They weren't necessarily that disappointed just sad that I was sad. It was one big group of sadness.

I've gotten back to calling the boys daily and seeing how the tour is going They haven't had many breaks so I haven't seen them since I left. Louis and I have become extremely close ever since my nervous mental breakdown thing after the first worst nightmare I had.

 He calls me every night no matter how late it is over there to checkup on me and make sure I haven't been drunk or high in the last 24 hours. He's like the big brother I never had. I have Rayne but now that school is back she's been very busy.

Louis and I talk about everything from how soggy my cereal was to how Niall and Luke were fighting over Starbucks. The thing I love about our talks is that he doesn't mention Harry because he knows how well I've taken it. (note sarcasm)

He also knows about Brandon and all my one night stands but he just accepts it and moves on like a normal person. I really miss him and the other boys. Lou told me Luke was wondering where I went and he said it was awkward explaining it because Harry was in the room.

I laughed happy he made me smile in a while. I took another bit of my ice cream watching little kids run around the park chasing each other. I remember when Harry and I used to talk about having kids one day. Now that's not going to happen unfortunately.

I just wish he thought about me as much as I think about him? Does he even think of me? Does he listen to every sad song ever written about love on replay like I do? Does he hope I'll call like I do? Or is he just glad I'm out of his life?

I wish I knew the answers to these questions that I've been asking myself for the last three months. They say sometimes it's better not to know what the other person is thinking but I just want to know if I'm constantly on his mind as he's on mine.

I looked up from my ice cream observing a couple holding hands and laughing. Ugh. That used to be Harry and I. Walking down the street laughing at his stupid jokes that weren't even funny. But it's not anymore. I angrily mumbled curse words under my breath before shoving another mouth full of ice cream in my mouth.

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hey guys so ch 6 got deleted so i just finished it on ch 7. i made sure that this one was completely saved before publishing this time. i'll try to update tomorrow but i have to pack for camp so i dont know if i'll be able to but i do have a six hour car ride on sunday so i will definitely be updating then

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you guy are the best by the way thank you for all your support on my books love you:) okay im so tired im going to sleep now

-katherine^_^

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