Chapter 1: Hard Life

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This is the sequel of "This Isn't Fair" , so if you haven't read the first book, you might not understand everything. ( Link to the first book ~~> http://www.wattpad.com/story/9439402-this-isn%27t-fair-boyxboy-malepregnancy )

PICTURE OF MICHAEL ~~~~>

PICTURE OF MICHAEL ~~~~>

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♂+♂=♥

*A few months after the accident*

I walked toward the reserved area for alcohol and took two packs of beer, two bottles of vodka and three bottles of red wine. I sighed before walking toward the cashier, waiting for him to tell me the price.

"45£, please." The cashier said, giving me a smile that didn't reach his eyes. I ignored it, I was used to it by now, and gave him the money before taking what I just bought. I left without a word and began to walk to go back to my apartment.

I took the keys out of my pocket and opened the old, creaking door. You may wonder why I live in an apartment now, well that's because when Russell died I didn't have enough money to keep the house so I sold it and now, I live in a small, shitty apartment with only one bed, a tiny kitchen and a bathroom without hot water. Of course, I would have been able to go back to my mother's house but I couldn't bear the look in her eyes and the memories. Especially the memories, it was the worst. It always was.

I put the alcohol on the counter before opening a beer and drinking it quickly. Then, I sat on my bed and stared at my scarred legs, waiting to pass out of exhaustion. I was glad I didn't have to work today. Finally, I closed my eyes, imagining that my life wasn't a mess, that Russell was sleeping right behind me and that my son was healthy and sleeping into my arms.

I woke up out of breath, covered in sweat and shaking strongly. My clothes were stuck to my skin as well as my curly hair on my forehead. I jumped out of the bed and ran toward the kitchen, knowing perfectly were it was. I took a bottle of red wine and drank it in a few gulps; I could already feel the effect of the alcohol on me. I walked toward my bed, trying not to fall and closed my eyes, knowing I was too drunk to remember the memories that haunted me since the accident. I passed out as soon as my head touched the pillow.

When I woke up, my head was throbbing, and I was dead on my feet as if I hadn't sleep for days. Slowly, I got up making sure not to fall as the room was spinning slightly around me. I made my way toward the bathroom and took a shower. The cold water definitively woke me up and I stayed a few minutes under it. I stepped out of the shower, dried myself before taking the first clothes I saw to dress myself.

Then I left the apartment, not bothering to eat something as I knew I hardly had something to eat. I walked until I reached a bus station and waited for the next bus to appear. I ignored everybody around me; I was used to their stare by now, and entered into the bus as soon as it was here. I sat on the very last seat in a corner, as usual. I closed my eyes, ignoring everything around me while I waited for the right moment to leave the bus.

I got up as soon as the bus stopped and quickly began to walk toward the hospital. I entered into the building, giving a forced smile to a nurse as I made my way toward the usual room. I hated the smell of the hospitals; it smelled like death to me. Luckily for me, nobody stopped me; by now everybody knew who I was and why I was here. I stopped in front of a familiar door and took a deep breath before opening it. In the middle of the room, there was a single bed, with a few machines around it.

I walked toward the hospital bed and sat on a chair which was next to it. The room was way too white for me, I hated it. Finally, I looked at the person who was in this bed. He was really small, his eyes were closed and a tube was in his mouth to help him breathe. He had mid-long blond hair and, if he wasn't as white as the room and if there wasn't this tube in his mouth, we could easily think he was sleeping.

This person was my baby, Jamel. During the first few weeks after the accident, I came here every day, hoping he would wake up. The doctors told me that he wasn't dead but his chances of waking up were really, really small. During the first few weeks, I had hope; I wanted to believe he would wake up but I'm not that lucky. I never was.

You may think I'm a bad parent for not seeing him every day but I can't; not anymore. You don't know how hard it is to lose your child, not to know if he will ever wake up; you don't know that. But believe me; I love my son with all my heart. I always will.

I sighed and took a deep breath. I stroked his cheek gently, ignoring the unpleasant feeling of his cold skin against mine. "Happy birthday, baby boy." I whispered as a lonely tear ran down my cheek. Today was his birthday; today he was supposed to be four years old. I took his small hand into mine and stared at his lifeless face, silently praying he would wake up. I wasn't a religious person but I would give anything to see his beautiful eyes again.

I stayed with him all day, doing nothing but stare at him. I finally left the hospital when the sun was almost down and made my way toward a bar. I entered into the dark building, and walked toward the end where the place was reserved to the employees. My boss, Sacha, was there, waiting for me as usual. He was tall but not really manly. He had short brown hair with blonde locks, deep brown eyes and a cute smile. He was young but hard working; that's why his place had a great success.

"Hey Michael, how do you feel? Are you ready to work?" He asked, giving me a gentle smile. I swear, this man was way too nice, always worrying and caring about people.

"I'm alright, no worries. I'm ready to work until the end of the night." I answered, giving him a small smile as I was trying to forget this afternoon. He stared at me suspiciously; it was obvious he didn't believe me. He was about to ask another question but was interrupted by Stephan, his current boyfriend. I silently thanked him and left the room to walk toward the bar. I smiled to the clients and served them alcohol. I liked my job, it was a great way to forget everything while I was working and I could have a few free drinks at the end of my shift which was just perfect to forget how bad my life really was.

If only I knew that tonight I was going to meet a person who may completely change my life...

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So, what did you think about this first chapter? Did you like it?

I will try to update this story soon!

Thanks for reading/voting/commenting! x


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