Phan oneshot collection

I cheated, then fell in love

Genre: fluff (something a bit different)
Word count: 873

(I wrote this as wattpad isn't letting me upload a chapter as apparently it's r rated which is bullshit but while it's being sorted I need to do something)

Dear Brandon,

I know writing a letter is probably one of the most shitty ways to end a relationship, but I can't explain it well in words, you know how bad I am with them anyway.

Last night when I went out with that old friend from uni we went to a club, and I hate to say this but I cheated.

Well, sort of.

I think you know that our relationship hasn't been going good at all recently, we keep fighting and we haven't even slept in the same bed in a week, let alone kissed or cuddled or anything. Anything that we used to do.

We didn't even have a fight, we just... aren't together anymore.

So last night when I saw this guy staring at me from across the room, I didn't deny my heart from staring back.

I have always had a thing for staring at beautiful people, it was one of the reasons that made me get up the courage and talk to you. Because you really are beautiful.

But so is Phil.

That's his name. Philip Lester. He's 26 years old and is a radio host for radio 1. He has thick black hair in a fringe like mine that goes the other way over his forehead and these eyes. His eyes are the bluest blue I have ever seen, I could go swimming in them and I feel like I would never drown. The waters of his eyes are so gentle, all I would need his him to keep me floating in them.

He came over to me once he had seen me staring, blushing slightly, as he obviously didn't this this sort of thing a lot. The only thing I could think of was how fucking adorable he looked that made me forget to listen to what he was saying.

He giggled when I zoned in and the first thing I had said was 'what?'. He asked if he could sit and talk with me, and maybe buy me a drink. I said yes with no hesitation. I was intrigued.

And then he was perfect. 

He was so innocent Brandon, and he liked all the same things as me. He was so intoxicating.

He ended up buying me that drink, and then inviting me back to his house to watch a movie. He didn't even have the intention of sleeping with me, he honestly just wanted to get to know me. And then we just clicked.

We watched Howl's moving castle because he liked my name so much and when his shoulder bumped mine while he was sitting beside me I felt electricity.

Then he leant over and kissed me. So softly a feather may have brushed my lips in their place.

But then I told him about how I was with you, and his sweet smile faded a little. He apologised, and said he was hoping for something a little more than friendship, and he was sorry that he had gotten the wrong idea about me wanting the same thing.

I told him he was wrong about that. I continued to say all the problems we were having and how it was ending anyway, neither of us had to courage to say. That and the fact living together wouldn't be so comfortable afterwards as well.

He told me I just needed to tell you, and have someone to hold my hand so I wouldn't be so lost afterwards. He offered to be that hand. He's letting me stay with him for a while once I move out. He even said that the main reason why he came to talk to me was that I looked sad. It's like he knew me instantly.

We didn't even sleep together, but I cheated on you. I cheated with my feelings.

All of the loving ones I had for you were gone as soon as he started talking to me. I don't know how, or why, but he's perfect for me. I hope you understand what I mean. It's almost like a shitty modern day clichéd fairy tale.

So I cheated on you by falling in love with someone else in a single night.

I never thought anything like that was possible, but now that I've felt it, I can't let it go for something that isn't working.

It's not like I will have packed and left by the time you get home from work. I will be waiting for you once you have read this letter to find me in my room so I can apologise to you properly. But at least you understand how I feel beforehand so you don't get the wrong ideas.

I didn't cheat they way most people do, but I did, and I am so sorry.

Please come and find me so I can say this in person. I want things to end between us the best way possible, and I hope I learnt enough about you to know you want the same.

I really am sorry, I wasn't meant to fall in love, but it really does just happen. It just wasn't with you.

Fate can be such a bitch.

Please find me.

With love of some sorts,

Your Dan xx