The Cursed Heart | BTS Fantasy AU [EDITING]

Chapter 79: The Artist

March 19, 2019

     It's 5 in the morning. There was no one guarding outside my door, my balcony doors were wide open, as I stared at my ceiling, looking at the mural I painted.

I was riding on Aria above the clouds of Nura, my hair was swept by the wind, I closed my eyes enjoying the moment, and I had a smile on my face. Last year, whenever I felt sad or upset, I'd look at the mural to remind myself, there was a time I was happy, there was a time I was free.

Now I stare at the painting looking at it differently, it was a reminder, I am free and I am happy.

It was spring again, it was a new season, a new year; a new chapter in my life. The struggles and hardships I went through the winter, has past, I overcame them. I'm stronger and braver now.

There was nothing and there was no one, who could possibly ruin my happiness now. Because I had everything I ever wanted. I have a family who loved me for desiring to be free, to be myself. I have friends who have accepted my flaws and stuck by me. I have Jivan who – despite my shortcomings – waited for me.

The people in my life have witnessed my worst and best moments of my life and they're still here, cheering me on.

After getting cursed, after having my life on the line, I learned how much I truly wanted to continue living, to grow old with the people that meant everything to me.

Ninurta always tried his best to keep me sane, to keep me grounded when I was losing it. Especially when Tristan and Selwyn were out of my reach. He was there to soothe my aching heart, he was there to calm me down. He was there to make sure my heart was beating, that I was still alive and well. He didn't just heal me physically, but emotionally he was there to heal the small wounds that stung a little too much for me to handle. He healed me in more way than one.

Selwyn, his human, but I felt like he was the person who knew me the best even when I kept things from him. Because he was patient and understanding, he never pushed me to explain anything to him. He may have stopped talking to me for a while and I finally understand why. He needed it, we needed it, the space to be apart from each other. He needed to move on from me and that meant not talking to me for a while, it was painful, it was torture, but who was I to hinder him from growing as a person? Now things were definitely better, there were no more secrets to hide or curses to be broken. He will always be the most beautiful human I'll know, inside and out.

Sigmund, it took him a while, but he did it. He was able to show that he does care for people and that he wanted to protect everyone even when he could be risking his own life. And he did, he put the lives of others above his own, because that's the kind of person he is. He still tries to act cold and distant after everything that happened, but I knew that everyone grew closer to him. It made me happy, that even once in a while, he let his guard down for people to know him better. He deserves to have people who will look out for him, he needed someone else to protect him when he didn't protect himself.

Javier, without even knowing it, he was always watching over me from afar. When he decided to solve Eva's situation without anyone asking him, he did it out of the goodness of his heart, when everyone was lost and hopeless, he tried to be the hope everyone needed. He never showed anyone that he was sad or upset, he knew that he had to play the role of lifting people's spirits when we were all down. Which happened a lot, I may not have thanked him enough, but I saw how he tried his best to keep everyone's minds at ease when I made them worry about me. I've heard the jokes he made behind my bedroom door to cheer up Sigmund, Ninurta or Chad when they were staying up late to guard me. He wasn't aware of it, but he helped me, I'd break into a smile before I fell asleep and it was thanks to him.