The Way You Make Me Feel - A Michael Jackson Love Story

Chapter 150 - Love Fantasy

Michael's POV

I furrow my eyebrows and steps back as my head starts spinning. I feel tears brimming in my eyes as they threaten to fall down my face.

I can't stop loving her. She betrayed my affections and left my heart in shattered disarray of pieces. Every single time she stole a part of me, she makes is impossible for me to put myself together. And yet, I always come back around to her. Why is that? Perhaps I hope that she will return what she has stolen. She never does. She just takes more. And for her, more is never enough.

I have and treasure the hearts of millions---but hers was what I wanted. Why is it we want what we can never have? She knows she could never return the love I share with her.

A sharp pain starts in my chest. As if pieces of my heart were breaking slowly and painfully and traveling to the very pit of my stomach. I stare at the check in my hands as I feel my world collapsing like waves around me.

How could she?

Maybe it was too much. To want someone who would never give up on me. To hope for someone who would never leave me, even on the days when all I can be is empty.

I wanted it to be her more than anything in the world. I wanted it all with no one else in this world but her. My eyes travel across the check in my hand over and over again as I stare at her name, hoping that I was reading it wrong or that the name before me would change into someone else's. My jaw clenches as I run my tongue across my bottom lip.

I couldn't help but feel angry with not just her--but even more with myself. The fact that she broke my heart, and I let her. She ripped it out of my chest and smashed it into a million pieces. And I'm here trying to figure it how I could pick up them up.

God, I should hate her with everything in me, but if asked...

I'd take her back in a second.

Which made me angry at myself for being this pathetic. Was I really that in love or was it the sheer fear of going back to feeling completely lonely? The only place I wanted to be is pressed against her with my arms wrapped around hers and our legs intertwined, talking about everything and nothing all at once.

For once, I finally felt I was feeling the love I craved for and tried to give everyone else. But it was all torn apart by a piece of paper that was more valuable than the love we shared.

Maybe it was my own fault;

I was paying the price for fame.

I was paying the price for being me.

I close my eyes,wanting to cry. But there isn't a single tear that runs out of my eyes. I don't even know what to call this feeling. It seems that my heart is hurting, and I just hold it and stare at it, until it breaks. I can't even show how much pain I feel. It seems like I'm drowning even if I know how to swim.

Why? It is one of the saddest emotions that I've ever felt. And I want to cry this feeling so loud. I just wanted to let it all out.

I hear a knock on the door; "Mike?" Frank says as I sniff before clearing my throat slowly. "It's time for rehearsal. Bill is waiting...you're already an hour in half late."

"Cancel it." I say from the other side of the door. "There is no rehearsal."

"Mike? Are you feeling alright?" Frank asks his voice growing worried.