Shawn Mendes Imagines

Surgery (Part 1)

*Y/n's POV*

Tossing and turning underneath the sheets, my eyes slowly opened. It was still dark in my bedroom, but the clock said it was just after five in the morning. I didn't have to be awake yet, but I couldn't go back to sleep with my mind constantly worrying about what was happening that day. 

As I sat up, I glanced at my calendar hanging on the wall by the bed. On the day's date, 'surgery day' was written in red marker and even circled a couple times. And it wasn't a joke or a mistake. I was going to have surgery on what the doctors thought was cancer and I had been worrying about it for weeks. 

Standing up, it finally crossed my mind that Shawn, my fiance, wasn't in the room with me. I turned on the light and walked downstairs. The only light on in the rest of the house was in the kitchen where I could hear Shawn quietly humming. "What are you doing up so early?" I asked as I walked up behind him. 

He turned around to face me. "I've just been getting your stuff together. I remember your doctor said that you will probably have to stay for a few days in the hospital, so I gathered some stuff you might need. It's in the bag over there." He pointed towards the living room. Shawn had come with me to most of my appointments, so he knew a little about what to expect. I really appreciated hearing that he actually listened to what the doctor said. 

"Thank you," I smiled, looking up at him. 

"Of course, love," Shawn stepped up to me and wrapped his arms around me. 

I hugged back. "Have you eaten breakfast yet?" 

He shook his head, "I'll eat later. I don't want to eat in front of you when you can't eat. That's just mean." 

"Are you sure?" I questioned, feeling a little guilty, "You really don't have to worry about me." 

"No, it's fine. I'm fine." 

"Okay." 

Shawn let go of me and turned around to face the kitchen counter again. "I got you some ice water," he told, handing me the glass.  

"Thanks," I took a sip of it through the straw. It wasn't as good as an actual breakfast, but thankfully it was cold and refreshing. 

About an hour later, Shawn and I were both ready to go. It was around six-thirty when I opened the door and started carrying my bag towards Shawn's jeep. My surgery wasn't scheduled until eight o'clock, but there was a relatively long drive to the hospital. Plus, it didn't hurt to be early anyway. Shawn opened up the back door and I tried to lift the pretty heavy bag onto the seat. But my hands were shaking so much that it was hard to get the bag even a foot off the ground. 

"Let me help, Y/n. I got it," Shawn said, reaching for the bag. 

I refused, "No, I can do it." 

Shawn placed his hand on my shoulder. "Y/n," he looked me in the eyes, "It's okay. Let me help you." I sighed and nodded, feeling a little defeated as I handed the bag to Shawn. He easily picked it up and put it inside then shut the car door. Giving me a quick hug, Shawn rested his chin on the top of my head. "Come on," he mumbled, "We should start driving. It's cold out here." 

For half of the drive, neither of us talked. I was worrying a lot about the surgery, but I didn't want to stress Shawn out any more than he already was, so I didn't say anything. Eventually, though, Shawn noticed how I was acting. "Your hands are shaking," he spoke up, "Are you scared?" 

"No," I lied. 

"Y/n, please talk to me," Shawn stated. 

I sighed. "Okay, yes, I am scared,' I admitted, "I just don't want to stress you out or worry you, so I didn't tell you." 

"Baby, you won't stress me out too much. I want to help you. I don't want you to feel like you're going through this alone." I didn't reply, just looked out the window. "How about we talk about it now?" Shawn suggested, "Tell me everything you're thinking." 

"Okay," I agreed. We talked about my worries for the rest of the drive and Shawn comforted me enough to where I was almost positive that I was overthinking it all and that I would be fine. Almost. The car came to a stop in a parking spot in front of the hospital and I was about to get out when I saw the tall building through the glass of the window. A wave of fear and panic came over me. "Shawn, I can't do this," I shook my head, turning to face him. 

He looked up at me as he took off his seatbelt. "Y/n it will be okay," he reassured, "Your surgery will go completely fine and then you'll hopefully be cancer free and we can go home to share a tub of your favorite ice cream. I promise it'll be fine." 

"You promise?" I asked. 

Shawn bit his lip and looked away for just a second as if he was trying to convince himself as well. His eyes returned to meet mine, "I promise." 

After entering the hospital, checking in, and being admitted into one of the rooms, I sat on the rolling bed in a white hospital gown. Shawn stood near me as a nurse was doing different tests and putting an IV in my arm. "That should be all," the nurse said once he was done, "The doctors will be here any minute to take you to the surgery room and the anesthetic should be slowly kicking in. You should probably say goodbye now." He looked at Shawn and then left the room. 

Pulling my legs up, I got fully on the bed and laid my head back against the white sheets. I was starting to get tired which scared me until the medicine started to calm me down. "Shawn," I voiced. It came out quiet. 

"Yes, love?" He stepped up to me and I could tell he had been bitting his lip nervously. 

I smiled at him, "I love you." 

That's when Shawn's bottom lip and chin began to tremble. He was clearly holding back tears. "I love you too, Y/n," he barely got out. His voice was breaking, "I love you so much. Don't be scared. I'll be here waiting for you. You're so strong, hun. I know you'll be fine. You have to be."  A tear slid down his left cheek. (I'm gonna cry writing this omg) 

The last thing I remember was Shawn squeezing my hand and pressing his lips softly against the back of it before I became unconscious. 

--

There was a dulled pain coming from the front of my neck. 

That was the first thing I realized after the surgery. Then my other senses kicked in, and I felt the IV in my arm and the sheets beneath me. My head also hurt a bit. Not too long after that, I heard voices. 

The first I didn't recognize: "She's going to need to stay here for a few days. It might be a longer recovery than we predicted." Probably a doctor. 

The second voice I knew immediately. Shawn. "But she's okay?" he asked and I heard a sniff. 

"Yes, she did fine. And it looks like she's waking up." 

My eyes started to flutter open. Once my vision cleared, I saw Shawn staring down at me. There was a huge smile on his face. "You did it baby girl," he wiped his cheeks with the back of his hand, "I knew you could do it."

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I thought this wasn't going to be very good, but then I wrote the ending and omg I was so close to crying. I hope you all liked this and it wasn't too sad lol. Also btw, I'm not like an expert on cancer/surgeries so some of this or the next part might not be right, but I did my best :)

Part 2 is coming soon!!!