Things we lost | c.g fanfic [heavily editing bc I suck]

Chapter 25

Carls POV

I wouldn't blame her if she hates me now. God! Why do I have to be so insensitive and a flat out ass?! I love Zoe so much and I just told her that I basically wished she was dead. She walked out, so for all I know she could be dead right now and I'd have no idea.

After our argument, I went downstairs to check on my dad. He's still not awake. I start to worry that he might have fallen into another coma, but I push that thought to the back of my mind. The only thing that stops me thinking that he died (or turned), is the low moaning he makes and the rise and fall of his chest when he breaths. He's so covered in bruises and blood, that I could barely recognise him at first glance. He looks like a walker.

"Dad?" I mumble quietly. I walk closer to him. Maybe he didn't hear me? "Dad!" This goes on for a few minuets. Me, helplessly shaking him and screaming. Him not responding. I feel like a ten year old all over again.

A few hours later, I'm sitting against the far wall near him. Zoe still hasn't came back, he's dead to the world...I'm alone. My gun sits unused next to me, and I'm considering just going outside and shooting some walkers just to give myself something to do. A distraction. I'm about to pick up my gun when he starts moaning. His hand starts twitching and he starts pulling himself off the couch.

"No, no!" I scream under my breath. He's turned. Oh god, he's turned. No, no, no! He's the only family I have left! I pick up my gun and aim at his head, still sobbing.

"Dad! Dad!" I keep crying out to him, childishly hoping for a response. Just groaning as he crawls closer to me. I shakily aim the gun again and then throw it to the ground. "I can't do it. I'm can't do it, dad. I'm sorry." I sob not my hands like a four year old.

"Carl," he mutters. I look up. No...no I must've imagined it. "Carl." No. It was real.

"Dad!" I cry, moving closer to him. I place his head on my lap so he can breath better. "Dad, I'm scared. I'm scared."

-A few hours later-

I stand with my dad in the bathroom as he spills water onto his shirt to wipe away blood and mud. Every once and a while he winces.

"Wait...where's Zoe?" He asks me halfway through dabbing water into his chest and stomach. I rub my hand against the back if my neck, the chain of the matching necklace I gave to Zoe biting into my hand. Tears sting my eyes as I answer him.

"I don't know." My voice wavers slightly. "We...we got into an argument and she slapped me. Then she walked out. My dad sets the bottle down, pursing his lips.

"Carl, I know she loves you to pieces. So, she wouldn't slap of walk out on you unless she had a damn good reason." He tells me. "What did you say to her, son?"

"I um..." I put my face in my hands and begin to sob. Everything's getting to me, I need a moment to break down. "I told her...that the governor should have killed her when he had the chance."

"Carl..." He says sympathetically, placing his hand on my back.

"Dad, I messed up." I whisper.

"Carl, your mother and I used to argue worse." He tells me. "And we were married for twelve years straight." I laugh slightly, wiping the tears from my face.

"Thanks dad." I smile. We hear a knock on the door and we silently grab out guns and walk downstairs. We hear it again, clarifying that it's not a walker. Dad crawls onto the couch and looks through the peephole of the door and then falls onto the couch laughing.

"It's for you."