- Third book - Cannot be read as a stand-alone! Read The Secrets Of Finnley first!
"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."
Two years after Finnley first dissappeared, Cristian finds himself back at square one. With no idea whe...
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– Saturday, April 7th, –
About 2 years ago, I was forced out of the closet in high school. About two years ago, I lost practically all my friends, and I solely leaned onto Stan, Felix, and even still Emma a bit.
About a year ago, I had build up a new life, learned who I could trust, but pushed them out of my life myself; still feeling lonely because Finnley was jumping back and forth between showing interest, and completely pushing me away. About a year ago, Stan and I finalized our agreement not to sleep with each other again. But we remained best friends.
Him, Nathan, me. We were thick as thieves and whenever something was wrong with either one of us, we'd call the others and support each other.
Right now, I feel as if I have nothing.
My jealousy too big to feel happy for Stan to have his boyfriend back with him. My jealousy preventing me from actually feeling relieved and happy Nathan is safe and well at home.
My jealousy is ruining everything, and it's too big to look past.
I'm a monster whenever I'm like this, and it's the sole reason I find myself at the doorstep of my parents' house.
I envy Nathan and Stan. I envy their relationship, I envy the fact they're together.
I hatehow I'm alone, how nobody feels the exact way like I do. How Sam is trying, since he was in a similar position for two years. But even he seems to have forgotten how lonely it can be to have that one person you like to have around, isn't around.
And he didn't even love Alex the way I love Finnley.
I'm no longer able to keep up my appearance, and I think if I would go back to my own apartment in the state I am now, I would fight with Stan and Nathan the second I'd see them hug again.
I would probably blame them for feeling lonely, I would probably throw it in Nathan's face that I feel as if Finnley deserved to be saved more then he did.
It isn't fair, and I know.
Nobody deserves to be in that situation. Not Finnley, but not Nathan either.
And I still can't shake off the feeling that it's unfair that Finnley hasn't been found yet.
I jump in my spot as soon as a car stops behind me, hurrying to slam the key in its lock to hurry inside to the safety of my parents' home.
"Cris." Oliver's voice is riddled with anger and annoyance. "Don't you ever freaking do that again." His footsteps catch up as I turn the key and open the door, turning around to face him.
I'm actually contemplating on closing the door to hide from him.
I don't want to talk to him.
He left me with my depressed thoughts, my loneliness, because he wanted a date with Alex.
