Chapter 27 - Communicate

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– Thursday, May 31st, 2018 –

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– Thursday, May 31st, 2018 –

"You want to raise the child." I repeat his words, pushing him away from me, to look at him. "You want to raise a child with Emma, who forced you to sleep with her."

"Yes, no, no." Finnley shakes his head. "I want to raise a child, by myself if I have to, that wouldn't exist if Jeff wouldn't have gotten in Emma's mind."

"Who the hell is Jeff anyway!?" I cry out. "I thought she helped Sydney to sell you, not a guy named Jeff."

"Jeff was involved too..." Finnley sighs deeply and he seems a bit defeated. I think he just lost his energy to fight, and I'm not sure why. "I just wish you would remember everything..."

"Yeah, me too, but that's not happening." I grumble, crossing my arms.

"First things first, Cris. Because I can't give you your memory back. I'm trying to help you, but I can't work magic. But I want to raise the child, because for more then a year, I wasn't able to live with my parents, and for a long time, that was all I wanted; live at home, with my own parents who'd love me. I can't put this child up for adoption and have her wonder who her real parents are and why they gave her up for adoption."

"You're in college," I deadpan. "You have no money, you have no job, no nothing to raise a child. And it's not a child you wanted in the first place."

"And now that she's on her way, I do want her." Finnley shrugs, staring down. He seems depressed, defeated, and all I really want is to hug him and tell him it's okay. But it isn't okay, and I have too many questions to just sit here and accept everything.

"Let's just go home... I need to process this."

"Yeah... sure..." Finnley whispers sadly, leaning against the door of the car, staring out of the window as we reach the highway.

"Finn, I'm not angry, I'm just... shocked, okay?" I lean towards him. "And I don't know how to feel about you raising a child with Emma..."

"It's not withEmma, Cris." He sighs, turning his head to send me a look. "Your mom is helping me to get full custody. Emma will sign away her rights."

"What, mom knows? And she agrees?"

"She eh... offered to help." He mumbles, fiddling with his hoodie nervously. "So did your dad, and Oliver..."

I swallow away a lump staring at him in disbelief. "They'll help..." I allow the idea to sink in a bit, still not knowing what to feel right now.

"My parents wanted to help, but well... yeah..." He shrugs a bit. "Your parents and I even talked about them adopting her, but I just... I can't."

"I'm not sure if I can... I mean... I'm not even sure if I ever want kids."

"I know." Finnley takes in a deep breath. "But I'm doing this... even if you wouldn't be there by my side."

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