Secret Deception (Jonathan Black's Love Story)

Chapter 30: Clarity

I sat up in our Alaskan King bed watching my husband sleep, tonight's nightmare replaying in my head. It's always the same. Walking down a hallway or a corridor or a cellblock or a forest pathway; ending up in an empty room, a large shower room, a dungeon, or a clearing; finding him hanging by his wrists, chained to the wall or bound in some way, hurt, bleeding and not being able to get to him.
"What are you trying to tell me, little ones?" I asked rubbing my stomach.
I felt Jonathan move next to me.
"How long have you been awake?" He asked wrapping his arms around me.
"A little while." I answered leaning into him.
"Another nightmare?"
I nodded.
"You should have woken me up."
"I was okay once I saw that you were okay."
"Are they all the same?" He asked.
"Basically. The setting isn't always the same, how you're... restrained or hurt differs but..."
"Nothing's going to happen to me." He hugged me tighter.
"I just can't shake it. It feels like the babies are trying to tell me something."
"You might be right but after how we were raised and the training we got when we joined the team and even prison I'm not going to let anything happen." He pressed his lips to my skin.
"Mama. Up." Josh's voice came from the edge of our bed.
"Did you ask Cam and Kay to watch the boys tonight for the Easter party?" I asked picking up our son.
"Yeah, Cam went to the library and picked up a bunch of Easter movies."
I laughed.
"Uncle Cam and Aunt Kay are going to spend some time with you and Logan tonight, okay?"
"Okay, mommy." He said playing with my hair.
"Are you ready to go get Logan and figure out what the Easter bunny left for you?" I asked our son.
His eyes got wide.
"Go wake up Logan and daddy and I will meet you in the living room."
I winked at him before he leapt off the bed and ran down the stairs.
Despite living on a literal 100 acre woods with multiple modern houses scattered throughout the forests and multiple other amenities that most children don't get Jonathan and I decided we wanted our children to have as normal a life as possible so we opted for modest Easter baskets.
Joshua loved dinosaurs and Logan loved the Minion movie. We decided to tailor each of the baskets to our sons likes.
Jonathan went out and hid Easter eggs for our boys like he did every year since they turned a year old.
After breakfast our boys happily searched for the eggs filled with candy.
Jonny and I sat on the couch my head resting in his lap while our sons played with their new toys with the tv on.
"I've been thinking..." I began.
"Oh no!"
"Oh stop!" I playfully hit my husband in the chest.
"I've been thinking about it for years, honestly. We have all of this space and five unoccupied houses on the property."
"Five? Aren't there seven total?"
"Yes, but I was thinking we can gift one to Cameron and Kay once they're married."
"Do we really want my brother living on our property?"
"OUR brother has been there through everything we've been through."
"Fair enough. I want trying to talk you out of it. I think it's a great idea."
"Anyway, I was thinking we could rent the houses out to struggling families to help them build up savings or help them handle medical costs without worrying about keeping a roof over their heads or the heat on or whatever."
"That's noble of you. Will that be safe?"
"I can ask Penelope to run a detailed background check on all adults we consider renting to."
"I think that's a wonderful idea. What made you think of this?"
"I've been considering it for a long while but especially since Josh and Logan were born and now that we're expecting again I've been thinking about how fortunate we are. Yeah, we've been through hell emotionally and physically... sexually outside of our marriage but financially we've never wanted for anything. I want to give some families some security."
My husband looked at me with such wonder and love.
"What?" I asked.
"You have a heart of gold, Alexia Black. I'm so incredibly lucky to call you my queen. Our children are so lucky to have you as their mother."
"We're pretty lucky to have you too, my king." He leaned down to catch my lips with his.
When Cameron and Kay came over Jonny and I went upstairs to get ready for our appearance.
"We shouldn't stay too long, Lexa. Not with you being so far along and with you not sleeping."
"I don't want to stay too long because I hate these things."
Jonathan laughed.
"Why are we going?"
"Because I'm the Director of the FBI." I sighed.
I dressed in a floor length teal chiffon one shoulder dress.
"You are a vision, Alexia." My husband mused as he looked at me.
"You always say that." I sighed smoothing out my dress.
"It's always true." He smiled taking my hands.
"Don't worry, Lexa. We'll go, take the pictures, have dinner, and then we'll come home. We'll be gone two hours at the most."
I nodded before laying my head on his chest.
Our boys were unaffected that we were leaving. Cameron had found a Cat in the Hat Easter special that captivated their attention. We took the sports car and Jonathan parked in the 'expecting mother' parking spot.
We walked the red carpet as was custom but as we walked into the building Dave greeted us.
"We have a problem." He said as he hugged me.
He lead Jonathan and I to a room just off the main dining room.
"What is it, David?" I asked.
As Jonathan and I rounded the corner there was a man who looked to be in his early to mid 30s with black hair hanging by his neck from a ceiling fan in the hotel lobby, his hands were bound behind his back ruling out a suicide.
"Let's get him cut down." I said after some crime scene photos were taken.
One of my unborn children kicked me hard as they laid the body down on a stretcher covered with a tarp.
"Are you okay?" Jonny asked placing his hand on my back.
"Yeah, one of our twins in unhappy."
"They kick you?"
"Yeah. Wait a minute... oh my God. It can't be." I exclaimed looking at the face of the victim.
"What? What is it?" Jonny asked.
"It's Andrew Gray."
"Who?"
"Do you remember the guy I dated when I was 16?"
"Yeah. Wait. That's who this is?"
I nodded. My child started kicking me insistently. I spun around in time to see an older man with graying hair and glasses rush at my husband's back.
"Jonathan!" I called out his name.
Jonathan spun around and grabbed the man's wrist as he tried to drive a knife into him.
Derek grabbed the man from behind and flung him away from Jonathan. Before the man regained his balance Derek had his gun trained on him.
"This is your fault, Alexia!" He screamed at me just before he slit his own throat.
I gasped as he fell. Jonathan rushed to me and wrapped his arms around me.
I sat in the conference room feeling my children kick rhythmically against my skin as Jonathan sat by my side.
"Does the name Gilbert Swanson mean anything to you?" David asked gently sitting across from me placing a cup of water in front of me.
I nodded and tried to speak but no sound came out.
I cleared my throat.
"He was my psychology professor when I was 13." I answered mechanically.
"But there's more, isn't there?" He urged.
"I never told anyone. Jonny already knows that his father was abusing me sexually from 11 to 15 but uh... what I didn't tell you.." I said turning to him.
"Do you remember when I went missing back during finals when I was 13?"
Jonny nodded.
"You're father had Swanson abduct and hold me for three days so they could... take turns."
"My God, Lexa... What else don't I know?"
"Jonny. I have an eidetic memory. I could take you through every hit, every slice, every touch that my father, your father, Swanson, everyone else has ever done to me but what good would that do? It would tear you apart. It tears me apart."
Jonathan wrapped his arms around me as I started sobbing uncontrollably.
"I'm sorry, Lexa. I'm sorry. I'm here. I've got you."