Victim (Glee)

36. Unknown

"It's pneumonia" I told her, only saying it out loud made my heart ache. Quinn sat and just watched me go on and on about it. "She doesn't really have much time left, I have never felt this kind of regret in my whole life" it was hard to breathe, knowing that my grandmother could be leaving this world anytime.

"San..," she said and wrapped her arms around me "I'm so sorry"

"I just hate that we lost so much time"

"I know you are" she slowly rubbed my back.

The rest of the time we just sat down on the bench, looking ahead of us until it was time for me to go. I was going to visit her in the hospital and for the first time in two years, speak to her. I was anxious, I was nervous. Quinn drove me to the hospital and promised to wait for me in the car until I was done. I would bring her with me but I knew what my grandmother would feel about it - the last thing I wanted to do was trig her.

"I'll be back" I said and walked out of the car.

I took slow, intense steps towards the room she was in. I was taken there by one of the nurses. I walked right behind her, wishing time could stop for a few minutes - so I could calm down. I was happy my parents weren't with me though.

"There, you can just walk in and I'll be back to check up on her in a while" she said and I just nodded.

I pressed the doorknob down and there she was. Laying on the gurney, looking up at the TV. I caught her attention directly. A smile grew on her lips, as one did on mine.

"Santana" she opened her arms. I walked over to her and hugged her tightly. "Oh, my sweet Santana" she said again.

"I missed you, grandma" I said as I pulled away from the hug. I took a chair and placed it beside her on the bed.

"I missed you too, honey.. So much" she took my hand in hers. Her eyes began to look watery. "So, so much"

"Don't cry, abuela" I struggled to not do it myself.

"You've grown, you've matured and I missed two years of it.. And now this, how can I not cry?" she said. "But, these are tears of joy, I'm so very happy to see you"

"I'm happy too" I swallowed a big lump in my throat.

For a long moment we just sat there - embracing the moment, my hand in hers. I wished more than ten times that this moment could last a little longer.

"You know I don't have much time left, I'm old.. I'm weak. The sickness is getting worse" she said and the pain in her could be heard in the sentence. "I just want to tell you before it's too late, that I'm sorry about how I reacted" she said, the weak crooky voice said.

"You don't have to say anything. Let's put that behind us" I said.

"Santana, I lost my granddaughter for two years because I was so stupid, I need you to know that I wish I could take it back. I love you no matter what. I need you to know Santana that I never hated you, even though I was very upset with you at one point, I never hated you" she squeezed my hand.

"R-really?" the lump was getting bigger, making it harder for me to control the emotions flooding inside.

"Really," she smiled with a wet cheek "I accept you now. I learned that it's wrong to hate someone for who they are"

"You have no idea how happy that makes me" I smiled back at her. "I love you, abuela" I hugged her again. This time, the hug was longer - it meant more.

A knock on the door interrupted us, the nurse was back.

"Do I need to leave?" I asked.

"No, not yet. I'll let you know" she smiled.