Her Scorned Heart

Chapter 4

Shanice POV

*

"It's quite possible I just bombed the fuck out of that test," I sighed to Vickie on the phone. I was on my way to the next lecture when she called to ask how I thought I did.

"Don't think like that," she said. "You know how you are. You think you did a horrible job and turns out you passed with flying colors."

"Man I couldn't concentrate for shit. My head was killing me and I could just feel everyone staring at me. No doubt because of that stupid ass post."

"Girl fuck them no life ass hoes. Stop minding what others think or say about you got it? My class is about to start but we'll meet up for lunch okay? Cafe at like two thirty?"

"Yeah that's fine. See you then." I hung up the phone sighing. I'm very much grateful for meeting Vickie. I would've lost my sanity a long time ago if it wasn't for her. She's a true friend.

She's also a complete nerd even though she doesn't look it. She wants to be a pharmaceutical researcher and create medicine. Total science geek. Not only is she smart but fierce as hell. When she gets really upset she turns into a total beast. Her boyfriend is way too scared to get on her bad side. I'm not a mega science nerd like she is, I very much hate anything math and science related actually, but we still have a lot in common.

"Look who came to class today," I heard the moment I stepped foot into the class. I rolled my eyes and ignored all the stares.

"She's actually showing her face," another whispered. "How brave."

"Stupid is more like it," I gripped my pencil hard as hell when I heard 'that' voice. "I mean how desperate can you be? Seeing your boyfriend all over the internet with every girl on campus and you're still with him? I know your options are limited but come on. I would never subject myself to something like that."

"That's what happens when you have no respect for yourself and even lower standards."

"I have no respect for myself?" I turned in my seat and glared at Sandra who was smirking at me. "Bitch at least I don't pop coochie to every nigga that gives me a sideways glance. You've got more bodies than a cemetery hoe so don't even try to go there with me."

"Honey no nigga wants your fat ass anyway. Dee sure as hell don't if this nigga stays in me and everyone else's inbox. Don't come for me because it's true. You're stupid as hell for staying with someone who doesn't respect you and everyone can tell you have even less respect for yourself. No sensible person would ever subject themselves to be constantly cheated on behind their back and in their face."

"You don't know shit so don't say shit."

"I know the only reason he's even with you is because when y'all were in high school you were depressed as hell when he wouldn't give you the time of day," she smirked. "You tried playing 'hard to get' when all it took was for Dee to notice you in the end. I may fuck different guys but I've never let a guy play me the way Dee does you. You can call me a hoe all you want but you won't ever catch this hoe looking down right stupid like you."

"Alright class sorry I'm-" I grabbed my things and rushed out of the class. I was on the brink of beating her ass but I can't. High school ass whoopings end in a few days of suspension. College ass whoopings end in jail time and possible expulsion. But if I had the chance to rip her throat out I'd do it with no hesitation.

That's the only class me and Sandra have together but it's one too many if you ask me. She knows exactly what buttons to press to piss me off. I sat down on a bench and tried calming myself down before I give myself a panic attack. I was so pissed my leg was moving faster than I could think.

"Don't cry," I muttered to myself. "Don't you-shit!" The tears rolled down my face. I was pissed and embarrassed as fuck. Her version was exaggerated as hell but it was close enough to the truth. Dee and I are not from around here and to have her knowing that means Dee told her. That fucking asshole told her a bull shit ass story. I didn't come to Dee. He came to me! I was going to leave him alone but he came to me after everything. That lying bitch!

"Shani!" Speak of the devil. I got up to leave but he caught me. "Shani don't run man. We need to-wait! Why the fuck are you crying?"

I glared at Dee's bitch ass. "It's your fault!" I yelled. "I'm tired of you Dee! I'm tired of you making me look fucking stupid and lying all the damn time! I'm tired of your shit."

"Shani calm down," he said looking around as people started to gather. "Let's talk somewhere else-"

"Fuck you," I snatched away from him. "I wish I never met your stupid ass! You're forever making me look dumb for even trying with you. Your cheating was enough bull shit now you're out here lying to folks that I damn near begged you to be with me?! Fuck you okay! I'm sick of this shit."

"Shani-"

"Fuck you Devante!" I stormed off and back to my dorm. I'm done with this entire fucking day.

~~~~~

By the time I made it back to my dorm my headache was back and tougher than ever and now my asthma was acting up. I popped a few pain pills and quickly got my inhaler. I normally always have it with me but since I was so out of whack today I forgot it. I wiped away a few tears as I got undressed. I showered to relax myself a bit before putting on something comfortable. The pills started kicking in and I climbed into bed and went to sleep.

It felt like only five minutes went by before someone started shaking me violently. "Go away," I muttered into the pillow.

"Bitch you stood me up!" I peaked at the person and saw it was Vickie. "I heard about what happened so I'm not surprised. I got us pity party food." She held up bags of junk food. "Come to the living room right now."

I groaned and wrapped my comforter around my body and dragged myself into the living room. I sat on the couch as she brought all the snacks out. "Thanks," I smiled taking a slice of pizza.

"That's what friends are for," she smiled. "And because I'm your friend I'm going to reiterate that I think it's time you let go. Dee doesn't respect you nor does he respect your relationship. I don't like seeing you hurt."

I nodded. Should I really let go? It's been three years. I can't just give up like that can I? I know I should but I don't know if I can. Man I need some help.

Tell me what you all think.

Sandra in mm