Shattered_Innocent Wife

All My Fault

Hey, dear readers, it's my birthday today. Please vote, comments and follow to make my day better. And I am uploading three chapters for shattered. Because it's my birthday I feel like giving. 

Sydney's POV

I woke up. I was there again. How? I tried to open the door but couldn't. It was locked. Just like that day. The door was locked. I couldn't open it. That day he challenged me to open the door but I couldn't. The only difference was this that he was not here. It was only me in that jeep. I cried for help. Papa! Adi! I couldn't breathe. There was no air. I tried to suck on the air. I looked back and the back seat was covered with blood. There was no one. From where this blood came. I look forward and the front mirror showed my face filled with blood. I couldn't feel pain but there was a lot of blood on my face. I tried to wipe the blood with my shirt. This is when I noticed that I was bleeding. My nose was bleeding and my forehead too. It's your blood on the backseat. Some inner voice told me. I looked back to found him. "There you are." He said and was about to grab my arm when I flinched back and fell.

My eyes shot open. Getting up from the bed I was hugging my arm that he was about to catch. I didn't know where I was for a second.

But in other, I knew it was a nightmare like every other night. I could hear the blood pumping in my ears. My heart was beating so fast that I feel like the whole room could hear the echo. Grabbing my head into my hands I tried to calm myself. Like I tried to do a thousand times a day. I know I can't sleep anymore. I can't risk going back there again.

"Whom you kidding Sydney? You will be with him in a matter of days." I felt the bile rising in my guts. I run to the bathroom to empty myself. I was feeling so tired when I tried to clean myself up. Looking at the mirror I found myself so weak.

I have become leaner. I don't know why I can't put on the weight. Maybe I throw up a lot nowadays. Not my fault his thought always made me nauseous.

It was still 20 minutes until my alarm was due. To get some fresh air I get to the window and open it. My room was dark but my eyes adjusted to the darkness. The room was filled with Abigail's snores. A woman I share my room with.

She lies every time. She is no one to me. I still remember when I first came here. She was the only who welcomed me. I trusted her and loved her. But the day she didn't come to save me. I knew that I was no one to her. It happens all the time. But the one who hurt me the most was Adi.

She was my sister. She was supposed to protect me after Dad. It was her who promised me that I will provide for you just like your father used to provide for me. Her words still echo in my mind. Even thinking about her makes me break into sobs. And today was no exception. I tried to put my hand on my mouth to muffle the sound of my sobs so Abigail doesn't wake up. She has a long day ahead. I looked at her wrinkled face. She is so old.

Abigail is no one for me. Not related by blood. She was not supposed to save me. So, she didn't.

Yeah, she used to give me fake hopes and false statements. But now she doesn't. Not after the day, I was betrothed to that evil man.

What he will do to me? Shall he hurt me Like before? Shall he hurt me every day? I looked out of the window to see how high it is? I should end my life. Why don't I end my life? Because you are a coward. You give in to pain every time. My inner self shouted at me. And that's it. All the time I give in to pain started coming in front of me. The day I was locked in the jeep. How I plead him because it pained a lot. How I give in to the pain when he got me in my room. The time I couldn't speak for my father because I was afraid and give in to pain.

Yes

It's all my fault. Every time it's my fault. Isabella told me that it's my fault. She is right. It's my fault that my mother died giving birth to me. It's my fault that I am orphan. It's my fault that I seduced him. It's my fault that I told Adi. It's my fault that Jennifer hates me now. It's my fault that he wants to marry me. I deserve all the beating. I deserve when girls make fun of me because all I do is making mistakes. I am slow, lazy and good for nothing.

I looked at the clock to find that it was still 10 minutes until the alarm clock. I moved across the room and turn off the alarm. I felt tired. I need to sleep a little more but I can't risk having those nightmares.

Walking to the window again I let my hairs untied. Moving my fingers across my hairs I was trying to tie the bun. I sat on the window and retrieve a flower pin out of my pocket. The moment I tried to open it with my mouth it slipped out of the window. I look out of the window to look if I could see where the pin went. But no I can't. As there was no light outside. It was pin drop silence given it was 4:15 am.

I was so busy to look out of the window that a sudden sound of a horn made me startle and I bumped my head in the windowsill.

"Ah" I winced in pain.

Who could this be? I thought to myself.

But then it dawned on me. Blake's were expecting guests. A long list of chores was hanging in front of me. I get down and get into my shoes in hurry. Still trying carefully not to wake Abigail up. I bind my hairs with some other pin. Wear my apron and wrapped my hairs in a headcloth. It's a must otherwise my thick hairs got lice because of dust. I was getting out of the room in hurry. But aren't those guests were supposed to be here at 8 am. A thought crosses my mind followed by the panic. Then who it could be? An unknown fear crept inside me.

I run to the window to nullify my fears. A car was parked out in the front. Two guys were standing. I couldn't see their face as it was dark there. What I could see was Peter talking to them. And then Peter ran into the mansion. The first guy walked into the light. Showing his dirty blond hairs. A sigh of relief let out of my mouth without my knowledge. But then there was someone else with him. He was still standing in the dark. I wanted to see him. So, I could relax that it was not him. But I couldn't see his face. Without me knowing I was getting out of the window more. He was still standing in the dark. But then I made his silhouette. Is he looking at me? No, he can't I am standing in the dark. But there was this creepy feeling that he was looking right through me. He can't really see me. And to my relief, that guy in the dark was not him. His silhouette was not like that ugly guy. I sighed in relief, got out of the room and started my day by cleaning the kitchen. After 15 minutes in the kitchen, I heard some people talking.

I suppose that these are the guests who are being welcomed by the Huntsville as a whole.

*******************

Is the first guy Noah?

Or

The guy in the dark?

Why does she think that it's her fault?

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