Rainy Days

Chapter Eight: Did Not Say to Drug Her

"AND THEN I time-traveled all of us here." Five said, eyeing Jordan. The boy in question was staring intently at Five, hanging onto every word. How the guy wasn't exhausted, Five didn't know; it was around two in the morning, after all, and even his own eyes where starting to droop. "I didn't mean to drop us off in your backyard—I tried for the Academy, but that obviously fucking failed."

Jordan ignored the obvious harshness of Five's words. "That's amazing," he said, wonder lacing his words. "And, sort of scary."

Diego, Ben, and Allison laughed. Klaus grinned and Luthers mouth tilted upwards. Five did nothing.

"So, Vanya is the cause of the apocalypse because no one told her about her powers?" Jordan said, turning his gaze over to the sleeping girl. She uttered a soft groan and flipped over, the blanket fluttering to the ground.

"Yeah. Also, because of many, many other deep-seated issues that our family has," Klaus said, still grinning. His eyes where flicking between all of his siblings, but they paused on Ben.

"Huh. So, your plan is to...show her love and affection?" Jordan frowned. "Am I getting that right? Is there another element to this plan? I fuckin' hope there is."

Five pulled on his ear again. Diego coughed awkwardly; Allison twirled a strand of hair nervously. Ben tapped his knee and Klaus averted his eyes to the floor.

Luther fiddled with his hands and said, "Uh...no?" he winced.

"Wow." Jordan giggled. "Just...oh my God," his giggles started to develop into laughter, and soon enough, he was holding his stomach, rolling around on the ground. The Umbrella Academy exchanged glances, their silent conversation going something like this:

Diego: Is he okay?

Allison: Uh...maybe.

Five: Hit him.

Luther: No

Klaus: Poke him!

Ben: No

Klaus: Laaaame. I'll ask him if he's okay.

As Jordan wiped tears from his eyes, holding his aching stomach—they didn't have a plan, how the fuck didn't they have a plan? Fucking fuck, plans are fucking important—Klaus turned away from his siblings and smiled at Jordan like one smiles at a senile old man.

"Er, Jordan? Are you okay?" He said softly. Jordan sat up, his giggles interrupted by little hiccups.

Five felt his heart skip a beat at the small little hiccups; they sounded like a kitten. He pulled his ear aggressively.

"Me? Oh, I'm fucking peachy, Klaus! I mean, it's not like six fuckin' superheroes landed in my backyard! Not like my brothers got more mental problems than Tate and me combined, and my mothers a fucking abusive-alcoholic-bitch!" Jordan slapped his knee, tears leaking out of his eyes. "Not like the woman that brings about the end of life on Earth has a fever and is sleeping in my air mattress! I'm doing fucking great, Klaus, thanks for fucking asking!" He rolled back into his life, grinning widely. It was fake, but his giggles where hysterical and the hiccups where coming more frequently.

Ben glanced outside and watched the trees sway, branches creaking. The water in front of him let out a soft gurgle. He frowned.

Allison snapped her fingers to get their attention and mouthed, "I think he's losing it."

Five chuckled darkly, his eyes flitting over to Jordan. The boy was very obviously teetering on the edge of a panic attack; vaguely, Five wondered who was going to help the boy chill the fuck out. Certainly not him, despite how much he wanted too. Jordan's skin had been soft, when he'd shoved his mouth closed; he couldn't lie and say it'd just been because he was an asshole. (It was mostly because he wanted to touch his face. Jordan's freckles where real fucking cute. He wondered what it'd be like to touch each and every one. The fuck?)