Blue Star Reviews [CLOSED]

Destiny's Play

Author: shreya23301

Reviewer: The_Sarcastic_Girl_

Chapters read: 3

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✒️ Cover:

The cover is nice but I didn't liked it at all. First, the pictures aren't that much clear. Secondly, I felt the cover should be more lighter. The pictures quality aren't that good.

The background is too dark. The dark cover looks good on mystery or paranormal books. They attract readers easily, but for your book, I think the background could be more lighter. The fonts are nice.

But my suggestion, change the cover of your book.

✒️ Title:

As I only read, three chapters, it's hard to say is the title is okay or not.

But still I felt title could be more innovative, because reading first few parts and blurb, I felt it their friends are playing cupid in their story not destiny.

✒️ Blurb:

"First impression is last impression."

As a reader, I read lots of book. Lot means a lot, you know. And the first thing, I see is their blurb. It makes work more easier, if reading the blurb I find it interesting then I will jump on it, If not then I may not open the book also.

Blurb is a important part of story, you see. It's the first impression of your book on me and I'm not impressed at all.

The blurb could look more good if you hadn't add ellipsis (three dots) in between sentences.

Blurb should create excitement in Reader's mind not only question. But there's nothing in your blurb.

Just a little introduction of Nandini then lots of questions... Like really?

Your blurb should create questions in reader's mind and truly it's highly lacking.

✒️ Plot / Storyline:

I know everyone love their books and their ideas which they create.. but that doesn't mean you have to flaunt about it saying, the story is so beautiful that I couldn't stop myself from penning it down.

Let the reader decide it darling, if you love this story that's doesn't mean everyone will love it. Some may disliked it, you never know.

I had gone through three chapters before reading prologue, I don't know why you added unnecessary pictures in the book. Book doesn't need characters face, sometimes people love a character without seeing them. I felt the photography part is totally unnecessary. Book trailer is okay, but I'm not gonna judge that. It's not my work.

I love many characters of Wattpad books without even seeing them, Even I was crushing on some of characters of those books. In short, you can work on more characters part rather than their art piece.

The prologue started with, "In Future, USA".

My first reaction, is future a place of USA which I don't know? My GK is poor,so that's probably the stupidest questions I have asked myself. Later, I realised the prologue, is written in different times. One is future time and one is present time.

The prologue was okay to me until you added those stupid question in chapter. Obviously, I know the prologue written using two different time. Nandini is gonna do suicide in future not in present, so you don't need to ask the stupid question.

Frankly, the story is not that much interesting. I tried to read it, but I could only read 3 chapters because it couldn't able to keep me hooked.

So, I can't say much about storyline. Whatever I had read it's plain. I don't want to be sound rude, I'm just being honest.

✒️ Grammar :

The story need editing. There are many grammatical errors.

Ellipsis (three dots) are used when you have to cut the sentence or refer a incomplete sentence. You don't need to use ellipsis in every sentence. It looks odds. The sentence construction is very poor.

Avoid using short forms. You are writing a story, not a message that you have to use short forms.
Moreover, We write I am or I'm, not I m. It spoil the presentation of story.

The presentation of story is very poor. Work on sentence construction. You don't need use italic for dialogues, normal fonts are okay. Italic are used to write dream sequence or past.

Payment :

Permanent Follow and a genuine review on my book, "My Angel'

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