Blue Star Reviews [CLOSED]

MY BEST FRIEND FOR LIFE AND MY BETTER HALF

Author:  raaz15
Reviewer: Shivani_SwaSan
Chapters read : Prologue + CS + 4 chapters

Cover :-

The pictures used in the cover go well with the plot and storyline you have chosen... but I really feel that a story needs to have a proper cover in order to put a good impact on the reader, something that pulls the reader towards your story instantly. It should be something that depicts the theme and summary of your story. The pictures are good but they kind of appear thick and a bit blurred too. My suggestion is you really need to make a new cover for your book. You can also refer to our covers corner 'Blue Star Graphics', they make awesome covers for books.

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Title :-

'My best friend for life and my better half', the title goes very well with your story but again, it doesn't fascinate the readers that much like it should. Also, the title is way too long. Personally, I would prefer shorter and more creative titles because that creates an everlasting impact on the readers.

But still, good effort in the title. ❤

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Plot/Storyline :-

You really need to put some sincere effort in your writing, dear.

When I first started reading, I felt everything was sort of messed up. I would consider that this might have been your first draft that is why the story might be highly unedited and needs lot of improvement in presentation. It was really bugging me into figuring out which character said what. (I'll talk about this in detail in the grammar part)

Coming to storyline... it's cute. Swara and Sanskar, two strangers marry each other and before they become husband and wife, they decide to become friends. The story goes on where we see some cute moments of SwaSan, but honestly, their relationship needs more elaboration. Not only their relation, but I feel like elaboration is highly needed in almost every scene in the story. SwaSan's relationship development needs more highlight.

Good storyline and progress. ❤

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Grammar :-

This is something that needs attention. I like the storyline but there is no proper narration. And it's not convenient to keep a sentence going on until it becomes too long... without any full stop. Keep the length of your sentences medium, don't continue them like a chain.

Dialogues should be written in proper way.
Either you can write in dialogue form...
(For eg:

Sanskar : Madam, in friendship, no sorry and no thankyou!

Swara : What a cheesy line!)

Or you write in direct speech way...
(For eg:

"Madam, in friendship, no sorry and no thankyou!" Sanskar told her.

"What a cheesy line!" Swara chuckled.)

At some places, yes you did use the direct speech way and at one place dialogue form too. But please keep only one format throughout the story and don't mix these two formats. You can either use dialogue form or direct speech form but please don't write dialogues like a sentence. Use apostrophes to start and end a dialogue if you write in direct speech way.

There are also a few grammatical errors which need serious attention. Overall, please work upon the grammar part!

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Fascination :-

It's a sweet story about two completely different individuals who don't know each other, but get married to each other due to their families. ❤

There are many points you need to work upon to make your story presentable. Firstly, the grammar (very crucial) and second, the emotions and also characterization.

Overall, a fine work that has scope for improvement ❤

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Payment :-

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PS : Payments aren't compulsory. Even for those who have taken reviews from me previously, following me isn't compulsory. I believe that I review books because I like to. And I don't expect anything in return for something I like to do. ❤😁😅

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Hopefully, the review was helpful  :)

Thank you for giving Blue Star Reviews and your reviewer, a chance.

Would love to see you again (:
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