Obsessed (A. Irwin Smut FF)

Chapter 29

Y/n's POV

I keep thinking of what Hayden said. She is right, if you love someone, you need to let go of the vanity and step towards sacrifice. I know I was rejected by him in a way I never thought I would be, but that does not mean I should give up so easily. I am back in my bed thinking about getting in my car and driving to his place, but I suppose I can wait until the morning, it is after all 1 am. I smile thinking about seeing him tomorrow. It's been too long, I have waited way too much to go and tell him all I am feeling for him. I am so excited I barely fall asleep. This weekend with Hayden has been such a change for me. I needed it. I needed someone to help me get out of that ugly state of mind. 

When I wake up I feel the sun entering my room, caressing my skin softly and I bite my lip getting up and heading straight for a shower. I feel a rushed feeling of adrenaline in my body that I know I don't even need coffee. All I want to do is go and talk to him. After I apply light makeup, I get in my car, not stopping to talk to any of my parents and drive to his place. I take a deep breath in and decide to get out of the car as I stared enough at his apartment. I stroll to his door and knock excited. I am biting my bottom lip waiting in anticipation, but no one opens the door. I knock again, but just like before, nothing. I sigh thinking he maybe works and I decide to come back later and drive back home.

"Someone is in a good mood." Mom speaks as I enter the house. I smile walking to the living room. "I have made coffee. Do you want a cup?" She adds smiling and I nod sitting on the couch.

"Yeah, I guess I am in a good mood. I have finally decided to go talk to Ashton." I say and I can see mom is shocked by the news. 

"Oh. How come?" She asks me and I can feel she is worried I might end up back in that dark place after talking to him.

"I decided I want to talk to him. I am not ready to lose him yet. I still really love him and I cannot give up on us, not yet. Do not worry though, I promise the worst that can happen is me getting closure." I explain and she brings me the cup of coffee and sits next to me. She gives me a weak smile and touches my shoulder.

"Sweetie, I am so happy to see you are doing alright, but, are you sure you want this?" She asks me and as I look at her trying to be honest with myself, I nod.

"Yes, I have never been so sure about anything in my whole life." I smile and mom presses her lips into a thin line. "What's that? There is something I should know? Did he move on? Does he have someone else?" I ask mom scared I might be too late.

"It's not that. Before you make the decision of fighting for him, I need to make sure, you absolutely know everything." She speaks and I gulp. What is going on?

"What is it about him that you think I do not know?" I ask her feeling a bit tensed by now. 

"The reason he actually broke up with you." mom says and I furrow my brows confused wanting to know already. "Look I know me and your dad were not okay with the idea of you two dating and your dad had it worse, but it was not just because of your dad's meddling that he decided to break up with you." She adds making yet another pause.

"Yeah, I know, it was because of some stupid fear of his of our relationship interfering with my carrier." I clear my throat and mom nods.

"That too, but before you had that accident, you were actually ..." She stops talking and I feel like I have to pull out every word out of her mouth.

"I was what?" I ask confused and inpatient to hear what she has to say.

"You had a miscarriage because of the accident." Mom says and I gulp trying to process the information.

"I was pregnant?" I ask confused and mom nods. I feel like the whole day has turned stormy. I cannot look at mom as I try so hard to think about everything. " What?" I ask outloud. That is why I felt like I lost more pieces of me when he broke up with me. It was not just because I lost him, but I lost our child too. "Who does that?" I say out loud once again, asking myself who on Earth could be so cruel to leave when the other person needs them the most?