Obsessed (A. Irwin Smut FF)

Chapter 21

Hearing mom ask if I was the one Ashton slept with, being too drunk too think of any excuse whatsoever to what she had just heard, I pleaded guilty without hesitating.

"Please don't tell this to dad." My mom's eyes go so wide, on ocean could fit there. She doesn't say anything. She just looks at me like I killed someone. At this point I feel like it would have been better if I would have done just that. Her eyes move to Ashton and then back to me. 

"Oh God. I think I'm gonna throw up." She says running to the bathroom. Fuck. Why is she so grossed out? I run following her.

"Mom, I can explain, but please- we both were going to tell you guys. Just don't tell dad, he is going to be so mad." I beg her trying to make some sense but it appears she is a little busy, throwing up."I don't even know how it got to there, honestly, it just happened and then well then it kept happening and we really just hit it off and-"

"Y/n, please stop talking." I hear mom saying as she's washing her hands and mouth. "We are not having this conversation here, especially not now." She adds looking at me and I am confused.  What am I supposed to do? Everything is screwed now. 

"You are going to go home, think really hard about what you did and we are going to talk about it tomorrow when we both are sober enough for this kind of talk." Mom demands and I gulp nodding.

"Okay. What about dad?" I ask and she gives me a death stare. Oh crap. Mom is really tough. I don't know why I was so concerned about dad finding out when I should have worried about mom more. 

"He is going to have a good time with his best friends now. There is no need of ruining a perfectly good night with some teenage drama. We are going to talk about this tomorrow. Now I do not want to hear any more of it." I don't even now how to respond to that. Teenage drama? Maybe she is right. How can this be teenage drama if Ashton is involved too? I should not think about that right now. Mom made it perfectly clear she doesn't want to ruin dad's night so maybe I should really think about whether what I have with Ashton is worth ruining their friendship. 

Should I text Ashton to let him know my mom knows? I go out of the restroom and look over our table and they all seem to have such a good time. I shouldn't let this ruin his night. I don't want this to ruin his night. I smile looking at him. He was the only man I met who I could have a decent conversation with, who treated me with respect, who knew exactly what to say, when to say it. Maybe this is just about that. Him reading me like an open book, knowing exactly what I need to hear? Maybe he is empty on the inside and all I crave is the feeling of rush I get when I am around him. It's almost like I got addicted to that feeling. I crave more each time, it's like I am on drugs. 

I go outside and take a taxi, knowing my mom probably already made up an excuse about why I left. 

*Where are you? Everything ok?* Ashton's text makes me feel so bad. I wanted to say goodbye to him. 

*I am on my way home. Everything is good. I just had a little too much to drink, but I don't want you to worry about me. Have fun!* I text him and sigh pressing the send button. 

I get home and I don't even know what to do. Half of me is feeling embarrassed and the other half wants to cry for the possibility of losing Ashton. I open my laptop and go on my blog. 

 I feel like the world is ending, like the universe played its biggest prank on me tonight. I feel vulnerable and ashamed. I feel like laughing and crying at the same. Laughing because mom found out about me and Dr Hot from the guy I cheated on with Dr. Hot and crying because it wasn't supposed to happen like this. We had the perfect plan. We were going to have a trip to another country, we were going to come home and have a nice dinner with my parents and we were going to tell them then. But now everything is ruined. I can't even seem to function correctly. Above all, I am not even sure I feel bad for sleeping with my dad's best friend, but at the same time, I am not sure it means so much to me that I have to let dad know this. It's all crap, because my mom knows and i know there's a matter of time until my dad finds out.