When it Rains | Daniel Ricciardo

Chapter 15 - Brotherly Love

When I got home, Jamie was waiting with coffee. I got a couple of stares on the plane and in the airport. I had my sunglasses on to hide my eyes and Renault had been nice enough to book my flight back in first class so that I could be more comfortable, but it was nothing compared to the sadness in my brother's eyes. 

You could see he had barely slept these past few days by the blue rings under his eyes.

He hugged me so hard that I had to push him away because of the pain in my side. He was crying and so was I. He got my bags off the conveyor and lead me to the car without a word. When we got in the car he paused before starting the engine, took a deep breath and then drove. When we were 5 mins from my place he began.

"So on Sunday evening, he packed most of his things, stayed the night and took everything to some guy Joe's place. Yesterday he took a flight out to his parents in the U.S so he's gone. For good." He added the last part as an answer to a question I had not yet asked. I nodded. He nodded back.

He helped me up the stairs and onto the couch and went back to fetch my bags so I had a few moments to myself.

The house seemed quiet, not somber. 

Quiet. 

Like something was missing, not empty. 

Gone. 

He was gone.

I had no more tears left, this past weekend had drained me. Jamie had made me dinner, it wasn't much but it was made with love. I ate as much as I could, which wasn't much either. He crapped me out about not eating and I told him it had to do with the pain meds which, I guess, was half true the other half was that I just didn't have an appetite.

That night he tucked me into bed and climbed onto the couch opposite as he used to when we were kids when I was scared. He did that every night for the first week along with; cleaning the house, the laundry - everything except my underwear. We both agreed he shouldn't have to be put through that. He was incredible.

I called into work every other day to make sure Jeremy and the team were getting things done. They assured me not to worry and to get some rest. Cyril had informed me that besides the team that were there, no-one knew what happened. Jen has sent through paperwork for my time off and I decided to take an extra week off, I had the days available. Loving your job mixed with being a workaholic has its perks.

The second week was a race weekend and I was bummed to be missing Azerbaijan. From everything I've seen Baku is a beautiful city, but the next week was Spain so I was excited for things to go back to normal. I spent my time updating my Pinterest boards for new ideas and ordering some decor items. New life, new place. My place.

Daniel and I chatted on the phone every other night as well. It was becoming a sort of ritual before bed or at lunch or early mornings, pretty much whenever we both were on our phones. He's been such a good friend, laughs are what I crave the most these days and Daniel is never short of those. 

He and Nico sent me flowers to the house on Sunday morning - special delivery, they said in the note that Baku Boulevard was filled with them and that they wanted me to know that I was missed. They also happened to be Renault Yellow, it was such a cute gesture and they called right after their facebook live to make sure I'd gotten them.

It's Monday morning, the Monday of race week in Spain. To say I'm excited would be an understatement. I was so ready to get back to the real world and back to Formula 1. I visited the doctor to check up on the healing process at the end of last week, he said that the cracks would heal themselves anywhere between one and two months, but that I was healing quickly and would be back to normal in no time. The bruises on my face were in their bluey yellowy stage - I feel like an expert on bruises these days... The cuts were healing nicely too, the one on my lip was deeper than I first thought and was harder to cover up convincingly. My neck bruises were almost gone too, but the hurt in my heart was still fresh.