A Weakness Called Love: Memoirs of an African Housemaid

CHAOTER 41: Lahibu

For Lahibu a herculean task lies ahead of her. For how could she sway Dauda from his devoted habit, yes Asabe was a bad habit he needs to be ridden of. Lahibu was poorly equipped for such task. She was one of those girls that was always loved the least. The girls that were never noticed, the girls easily forgotten. She was loved the least in her family, not because she was bad or reckless or daring but because of her lack of peculiarity. She was too basic to be noticed. It wasn't her looks that were the problem. Lahibu is not ugly but she is not beautiful either. She is neither tall nor short. She was of medium girth.

Every slip, omission or mistake she made was taken to heart and was exaggerated. It was as if she wasn't lovable. Nevertheless, Lahibu was not a quitter she always fought to be noticed, not a single failure deterred her. She kept hoping and hoping. She persevered. Perhaps her marriage to Dauda will finally pay off at last.

Asabe had been very mean to her. She will come out and insult Lahibu using innuendos. When Lahibu sweeps, she makes sure she walks everywhere so she will disrupt her work. Sometimes she will kick some of the dirt backwards and will say "looks like you have a long way to go".

Lahibu ignored her and was patient with her, afterall she is the mother of Dauda's children. Sometimes she sings songs that insults Lahibu's fathers profession. Lahibu's father is a butcher. In our lands butcher's are looked down on.

When its Lahibu turn to be with Dauda, Asabe will pretend to be sick, or she will claim one of her kids is sick. She will say she needs Dauda's attention. Women who share a husband take turns to be with The husband. Usually a two day rotation is done. The other day after Lahibu had finished cooking, Asabe went to where she kept Dauda's food and smeared the food with salt. When Dauda tasted the food, he spat it out and scolded Lahibu. Lahibu swore she had tasted the food and the food was okay. One of the kids saw Asabe coming out of the kitchen and he told on her. When confronted Asabe denied everything, she even had tears in her eyes.

She further exclaimed "I took Lahibu in with an open heart, I know in the beginning I was not on board, but your holy matrimony changed everything for me. Lahibu is not my competitor, she is a junior sister to me, who I feel is my blood and flesh. For her to suspect me of this, really hurts me. I will never do anything to harm her in any way"

Dauda believed Asabe.

Lahibu had been a great wife. She cooked, cleaned and takes care of her husband with devotion.

I was outside singing one of those sweet romantic songs while Lahibu was sweeping the compound. Asabe, the trouble maker came outside. Seeing Lahibu made her angry. She kicked the dirt to the already swept place Lahibu had laboured. Lahibu remained silent. Asabe changed strategy and delved on indirect verbal abuse.

"all my life I had always been everybody's favourite, my mother's, my father's and my husband's. I had always been bestowed with this character that draws people to me. Some women can't even attract cockroaches or flies. They are just bad luck. Just the plague everybody avoids, what sort of a child gets rejected by his own mother! I tell you what he is called 'a tragedy'"

Lahibu looked hurt. Cleary Asabe had hit a nerve.
" at least my mother loves me, She is not ashamed of me. " Asabe sang.

Tired of Asabes constant harassment Lahibu asked
"Who's mother doesn't?"

"Yours" Asabe replied flatly
Happy that she had hit a nerve, she continued

" You are not her dream child, she tolerates you because she feels she is stuck with you. Give her another option she will take it, even if the child is a midget she will have them rather than you, has She ever for once sang your praise? No! Because you are just someone who God has made your paths entwined. She considers you as one of God's test that she has to endure to gain reward. Nothing more. Who can ever love someone that his own mother had forsaken?! Dauda only married you to make a fool of you. It is all a game he and I concocted. I see you are becoming too comfortable. I can end this stupid game anytime because honestly I am becoming bored, you are not a challenge at all. You are ...."