Beyond the Reasons || JUSTIN FOLEY

Thirty-Three

PRESENT TIME
POLICE STATION
IMOGEN'S POV

[I'm putting a trigger warning here because this is the scene where Justin explains what happened to him, and I am not a victim of sexual assault, but hearing what that man did to him at five years old even triggers me, so please skip this scene if you want to].

I was down at the police station.

Clay got arrested. I called my parents, obviously, so I think they should be here soon. Justin and I sat in the waiting room, alone, so I thought it might be a good time to talk to him about what happened. "He's still back there." Justin said as he sat back down in his chair. "Probably gonna transfer him to County." He said, and he was talking about Clay and I sighed.

"Goodness! Are you okay?" I asked, and Justin looked over at me. "You would tell me if you weren't? 'Cause clearly, I don't always know." I said. Justin took a deep breath and I could see tears threatening his eyes as he looked at me, and then he looked down, folding his arms over his chest.

"When I was five. . my mom had this boyfriend. This fucked-up guy who would just get high with her. When. . she'd pass out, he would. . he would just come into my bed." Justin said, and I seriously felt my heart drop. I've never hated Amber Foley so much than I do in this moment right now, and if I ever saw her again. I promise I will punch her in her drug addicted face for ever letting anyone come near Justin.

Justin took a deep breath, and I laid my hand down on his hand. "It's okay. . take your time." I whispered to him before squeezing his hand, and I felt him grip my hand slightly tighter as he continued.

"At first, he would just. . put his hands on me. Then he started. . He started making me put my hands on his. . and he would be hard. He. .-He. .-" Justin trailed off again, and more tears were coming to his eyes, so this must be the bad bad part, and I ran my thumb over his knuckles.

"Just take your time." I whispered to him, and he nodded his head, slightly looking down again.

"He. . He'd put his fingers in my mouth and start to jerk off." Right then and there, my heart broke. Such a twisted thing to do, and to put a five year old through. My heart was broken, and my stomach was nauseous. "He only lived with us for a couple years. On and off. When I was on the streets. . and I needed money. . I would do stuff, to guys." Justin said.

I can't believe I ever told him that I wished he was dead when he came back because after what he went through out there, just to try and survive, he probably wished that he was dead too. I felt more tears coming from my eyes, but I didn't wipe them. My only focus was listening to Justin, because that's what he needed.

"Sometimes, they would do stuff that. . we didn't talk about. Or that I didn't want to do. I just felt like I was five again, and. . it was all my fault." Justin said, and as he started crying, I started to cry more, and I squeezed his hand before leaning forward.

"Hey. I am so sorry. . and I am so sorry that I never knew that. But it was never your fault. Not when you were five, and not last year either. All this time, you've been listening to me, and helping me, and letting me preach to you about recovery." I said.

"You needed time." Justin said, leaning forward and grabbing my other hand, so I gave both of his hands a gentle squeeze. "For yourself. You deserve that. I wanted to be there for you so bad, Mimi. I didn't want my shit to get in the way of your shit." He said.

"Your shit is my shit." I said back to him.

"We share shit." He said, which made me smile as I saw the opportunity to lighten the mood.