The will of the Gilbert's (An Brantley Gilbert Fan Fiction)

Chapter 31

Lydia's Pov 

I was sitting outside piling the potato's for the stew mama is making for dinner tonight. It's been little over a month since that nightmare happened. I still can't believe that this happened and after my mama told me what happened to her. I don't leave the house or the yard at all. I won't go anywhere without mama or daddy with me. I still have the nightmares playing out in my head. I'm never going to get over this. I'm feeling like I'm loosing this battle. I looked out to the yard and saw my little brother Henry and little little sister Dorothy Mae playing together. I felt the breeze of the wind so I stood up but I got a little dizzy so I just sat back down. This is the 5 time that I've been dizzy in the past couple days. I was about to get up and go in when I felt like I was going to get sick. I ran off the porch so my little siblings couldn't watch me get sick. I ran behind the house so I can throw up without anyone watching me. 

After I threw up my breakfast I sat down on the grass so I can cry. I've been raped and I've seen my mama like this with all of my siblings before. I need to go and see the doctor, but I don't want no one coming with me. I don't know what to do? I'm at a lost point in my life. All I wanted was to get married and have my own family. But now I don't know what to do. 

"Lydia there you are. I need to go to--- Honey are you okay?" Mama asked me. I looked up at her. 

"Yeah I'm fine." I told her. I tried to get up but I got dizzy again. Mama helped me. 

"I think we better go and see the doctor." Mama told me. I looked at her. 

"Mama no--" Mama cut me off by giving me her 'Mama Look'. I smiled at her. 

"Yes ma'am. Will you be with me." I asked her. Mama smiled at me. 

"I won't leave your sight. Come on let's get ready to go. I can see we need to go today." Mama told me. I walked into the house with mama. 

As mama was letting Maw know what we was doing I was in my room getting ready. I don't know why we are going to town I already have a feeling I'm with child already. But to make sure I'm willing to go to double check. I walked out of my room in a new dress since I got a puke on it. As I was making my way to mama I was looking around at the pictures mama have on the wall. Mama and daddy both didn't have a big family growing up. Yes pa did have some siblings but pa hasn't seen them since after the great war of '65 and I've never met any of my aunts or my uncle on my papa's side. But it didn't matter to mama or pa. They went on had 4 sons and 2 daughter. They both are happy as they can be. 

I walked outside and saw mama in the buggy already I walked over to it and climb inside. I looked at mama who is always smiling up a storm. I looked at her. 

"You ready honey." Mama asked me. I looked at her. 

"I think so mama." I told her. 

"Ha! Get going boys!" Mama yelled at the horses. After a few minutes after we left the cabin we was on the road going into town. 

"Whatever happened we are here for you Lydia." Mama told me. I looked at her. 

"Mama I already know I'm with child." I said to my mama. Mama looked over at me. 

"Okay." Mama said to me. I looked at her. 

"You are the strongest woman ever. You know that right." I asked her. Mama smiled at me. 

"Because of you. You was my first and I was over protected of you. You come into this world on a cold night and you was so small. I just loved you and I knew after you was born everything will be okay. And if you are with child you will be okay too. Plus your pa and I won't let nothing bad happened to you." Mama told me. I smiled at her.