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LISA POV

I've moved out into a smaller apartment and then I went to see Ella today , I took her out and then brought her back to my apartment , she prefers staying her because she said it's cozy , even though Irene is trying her best Ella tells me she gets annoyed at Ella sometimes and that her mom is always on her phone.

Now you ask me how that makes me feel , I just feel as if my daughter is being neglected sometimes and sometimes she feels too scared to say anything to her mom incase her mom has a sudden outbreak.

What kills me the most is when Ella asks me where Jennie is? How do I explain that my own insecurities is the reason why Jennie doesn't want to be around me , I let my insecurities stop something so beautiful even though Jennie gave me no reason to be insecure I knew that she accepted me , cared for me despite me not being financially stable.

I could say I'm doing quite well considering the amount of customers my bakery has , it gets a lot during the day and i should be proud but everytime I remember she helped me with this , everything the whole bakery reminds me of her , the time we painted and worked together on what kind of decoration we wanted.

When she kissed me in here and I knew from that day she was the one , I just knew it when she brought me lunch and I couldn't wipe the smirk of my face that day , I couldn't control my heart beat.

I love her

I love her so much.

And I've lost her , because I'm insecure and I believe good things just don't happen to me , I destroyed it before my life could actually take her away from me.

But I miss her , I miss her so much and I never even got to tell her I love her , it feels shit knowing she's on the other side of the world , it felt shit leaving her apartment , it felt shit looking at scones and it hurts when I can't see any messages.

Jisoo: Hey Jennie landed today , was wondering if us three can take Ella out

Lisa: If she wants to take Ella out she has to message me and not get you to do it

Jisoo: O okay , what tf happened to you

Lisa: Jennie Kim happened to me

Jisoo: I kinda gathered

Lisa: where is she btw?

Jisoo: ummm japan?

Lisa: seriously?

Jisoo: Jamaica?

Lisa: JISOO I KNOW SHES HERE BUT WHERE IS SHE LIKE LOCATION?

Jisoo: Umm Grand Canyon

Lisa: oh my god

Jisoo: hey she's my best friend I can't exploit her

Lisa: IM UR BEST FRIEND TOO

Jisoo : I know but I wouldn't exploit your whereabouts either , plus that would cause my wife and I to fight cos Jennie's her baby

Lisa: SHES my baby too

Jisoo: from the looks of it looks like she isn't 🙃

Lisa ; SHES always my baby and she better know that , WHATS she saying about me

Jisoo: I'm trying to be a good mother I cannot repeat those words

Lisa: seriously? she that mad at me?

Jisoo: Na I'm joking , she wants to see Ella but doesn't want to talk to you

Lisa: did she change her number?

Jisoo: yeah pretty much

Lisa: lol I knew it , it's fine I'll see her soon & tell her I said that

Jisoo: my wife will kill me if I bring u up , she's trying to cheer Jennie up

Lisa: I guess it's good that she's getting cheered up , I'll drop Ella off to you guys in the morning

Jisoo: okay & don't tell your wife that Jennie's going to see her ok

Lisa: I know don't worry , has Jennie eaten?

Jisoo : she looks thinner that's why Chae was mad at her but we've just ordered pizza and desert so don't worry I'm gonna fatten her up

Lisa: Ahh thank god!

Jisoo: are you guys going to sort this out or?

Lisa: Nope , she deserves better I guess , it's the truth and too many people have said it to me including Irene and her father.

Jisoo: who gives a shit who says that , it's just you two and others shouldn't have a input and Ella fucking loves her , we were actually worried Ella suffered from separation anxiety from Jennie because she cried a lot when we went to Majorca , we had to face time Jennie to calm her down , I think in your heart and Ella's heart you both know she's the missing piece in your lives....

Lisa: Help me Jisoo , I fucked up

I re read Jisoo's message as I sob in bed , wrapped in the sheets alone.

Jisoo: When I drop Ella back home tomorrow we will speak about this okay , just relax I've got your back

Lisa: does she hate me??

Jisoo: that isn't possible for Jennie

Lisa: are you sure??

Jisoo: yes I promise.

I can't sleep now , I don't know what I've done and what to do , I jump out of bed and I get changed and run to Jennie's apartment.

She doesn't open the door but I remembered she gave me spare keys so I open it and storm in.

She's sitting there on her couch , she purposely ignored me but she has a book in her hand and her glasses on , she looks so effortlessly beautiful , although she had become thinner and it's my fault , I snatch the book out of her hand , I grab her book mark and put it in there and then I throw it on the couch.

"What do you want?" She quietly says

"Look at me" I respond as she does everything in her power not to look at me.

So I crouch down to my knees and pull her neck and crash my lips into hers , she whines quietly but I don't let her go so easily.

"It's always when you want to come back to me you come , other than that I don't have a say in this at all" she sobs but I peck her lips lightly as I use my thumb to wipe her eyes and kiss her comfortingly.

"I'm sorry , I promise Nini , I love you to bits" I murmur into her mouth , my butterflies are on butterflies right now because I felt so much relief getting it out of me.

"Do you mean that" she cries even harder and I chuckle into her mouth as she pulls me harder

"More than anything in the world and I'm sorry I made you feel like that okay , from now on I'm here for the long run I promise you this won't happen again"

She opens her mouth to say something back and I know what she was about to say but I'm hit at the back of my head with something and I lose my consciousness.

The Social Worker // JENLISAWhere stories live. Discover now