laila's pov
I set my latest painting on the easel before wiping the sweat off my forehead.
Lately, I can't stop making art. I'm just so antsy. I can't stop fucking moving. I'm literally giving myself anxiety.
I haven't eaten or slept since I came home, so that's 5 days.
Mads thinks I'm eating because I take my food out to the shed and then just throw it away before continuing what I was doing.
I guess in a way this has been a blessing? I don't know, my art has been going for more than 500k a piece and I've made maybe like 10 pieces over the duration of 5 days. Overall I've made maybe 7.5 million dollars from the auctions.
The money doesn't mean anything though. If I had to choose between all of the money in the world and my parents, I think we all know what'd I choose.
I also miss the boys a lot. Matt's called me everyday before he went to bed and I text Ciaran all day long. It's not the same though, than being physically there. But I mean, I'm the one who decided to leave so I don't think I really have the right to be upset.
Flog gnaw is a couple of days and I honestly don't even want to go. I miss my parents. I literally haven't been able to enjoy anything. I haven't even smoked since I came home.
I just don't feel right.
Sugar began to blast through the art studio and I thought of the "Sugar" Sun. I should make a sugar sun pillow.
I opened the video and took a screenshot of the sun.
I sketched it and then dissected each feature of it, labeling the materials I want for each feature (the eyes, lips, base, etc.) I then did the math just to make sure that it would transfer well and it wouldn't look like the walmart version of the sun.
"Mads wanna take me to Joann?" I asked walking into the house.
"Only if you actually sit down and eat a meal and take a nap at least." She said giving me wide eyes from the couch. I didn't really have a choice since I shouldn't be driving sleep deprived.
"Deal." I said grabbing my wallet off the counter.
"And go change your clothes and shower before we leave. You're gonna start attracting flies." She laughed.
"That's fair." I hadn't showered or changed since I came home. I haven't really done much but over work myself.
~
ciaran's pov
Today we had an off day in Tennessee. Everything's been surprisingly okay. Matt's cried a bit but I think now he's just worried about finding out what happened to his parents.
We all talk to Laila all the time, but she's only gonna tell us what she wants to. For example; we facetimed her yesterday and she was wearing sunglasses and a hoodie. She also sounded very, I don't know, antsy?
She puts on a good front though.
All of us also felt extremely guilty because of what happened on her birthday. I can't believe we forgot. I knew Matt felt guilty about it too, he's been trying to think of something to do for her since she left. He knows she didn't leave because we forgot her birthday, but he kinda blames himself for her running back to California.
My biggest problem is that we went out the night before and got shitfaced. I should've stayed with her. We all should've went to get dinner or something I don't know.
I just hope she's doing okay, even though I know shes not.
My thoughts were interrupted when Matt yelled at everyone to quiet down.
I heard the little facetime connecting noise and then Madison's face popped up on the screen.
"How's she doing." Matt asked worriedly.
"You want the honest truth or what she would want me to tell you?"
"The truth please."
"Well she hasn't slept, eaten, showered, or changed since she came home. Well she's showering right now because she asked me to take her to JoAnn since she shouldn't be driving cause of the whole sleep deprivation thing. Uhhhh she's been in her Art Studio since she got home. She's made so much art look at this." Madison said before flipping the camera.
Jesus fucking christ. There was like 10 checks for a ton of fucking money.
All of our faces went wide and she continued, "Yeah I know, Brandon keeps dropping them off whenever he comes to pick up a new piece. She has not. Stopped. Making. Art. Oh and also, I told her if i take her to the craft store she has to eat something and take a nap of some sort."
"Thank you Mads. Seriously. I know she can take care of herself but you being there for her helps me sleep at night. I've been thinking. Like I need to do something. About the whole birthday situation. And I don't know what to do." Matt explained.
"Hm, I'll talk to her and see if anything she says triggers an idea." Madison suggested.
"Oo yeah. Let me know. Call me if you need anything. Seriously. Like anything. And she's gonna try and take like a 15 minute nap so check her phone and if she set a timer just turn it off and she'll stay asleep."
"Sounds good Matty, Have fun and don't worry about her. She said that's why she won't tell you what's wrong. She said you have a whole ass tour and thousands of people go to see y'all a night, you have bigger things to worry about than her. I know you disagree, hell even I disagree. But have fun out there Matt. Worrying does nothing. They'll call you when they find something. Everything's gonna be alright. Kay?"
"You're fucking amazing mads. Love you, have fun at the craft store." He said with a giggle.
"Love you too and tell the guys I said what's up. Oh and when she does talk it's mostly about Ciaran so just let him know she's thinking of him." She said waving and then hanging up.
My fucking heart exploded when she said that.
~
4 hours till 4/20 lets get LIT 😏🥵
