no idea ❀ mattia polibio

quaranta­quattro

𝐍𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐄
𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐄

— madison

"what i can tell is you that you're going to crave that shit sometimes." leilani tells me as she looks at her nails.

i laid back on my bed frustrated. leilani was at my house and we were doing calculus homework together. talking about having sex is a lot more frustrating than i thought.

"did it hurt?" i asked her as i bit my nails.

she smacked my hand away from my mouth, "yes but it feels good after." she tells me. "really good."

"have you and ale done it?" i ask her and she shakes her head.

"don't be scared, you'll enjoy it." she asks.

"i'm just scared of the pain." i tell her.

"gosh you're such a virgin." she laughs at me and i throw a pillow at her. "ow!"

"don't call me a virgin." i tell her and she laughs.

"bitch are you not one?" she raises her eyebrows at me and i roll my eyes. "do you plan on doing it with mattia any time soon?" she asks me and i shrug.

"i don't think that's something you plan." i tell her. "i just don't know how i feel."

she tilts her head in confusion, "what do you mean?" she asks.

"i feel ready, but i don't." i tell her.

"i know exactly how you're feeling." she tells me. "you feel ready before doing it but thinking about it makes you nervous so you don't think about it."

how the fuck did she just pin point exactly how i'm feeling?

"okay, what the fuck. that's exactly how i feel." i tell her in clear shock causing her to laugh.

"girl i am the sex expert." she tells me with a smug smile. alejandro and her have something in common. "trust me, that feeling is going to go away once you enjoy it."

i sighed before continuing on doing my homework. we'll just have to see when the time comes.

—

lauren 🤍

guess what bitch

what bitch

i-

i'm going to ignore that

i'm going to nj for winter break

NO WAY

YES WAY

PERIOD

omg

you better introduce
alejandro to me

bitch what about sebastien

we broke up :/

what happened now?

i'd rather tell you in nj

but all i'm going to say is you're not going to be surprised

oh god

well alejandro is taken now

bruh are you deadass

yes and his girlfriend is my
friend so BE NICE

you act as if i'm never
nice

you're not

okay true but it's not
like i'm going to steal her man

i know but still

but if alejandro pulls a move honey
i'm going for it

LAUREN

i'm kidding i'm not like that

they're not going to be here

pls tell me you're lying

maybe this trip won't be as fun as i thought

BITCH ILL STILL BE HERE

LMFAOAOO

right

but they're leaving to orlando

when do you leave?

december 29

and when do you come?

dec 27 like around 1 pm

fuck yeah

okok you can still meet them

why when do they leave?

december 27 at 10 pm

okayy

you better show me around

OMG IS IT SNOWING OVER THERE

YES

it's really cold over here like REALLY
cold so bring layers of clothing

fuck

okok

bitch i'll see you thennnn

—

author's notes
tiktok is being a little bitch and i can't log into my account. i hope you guys are enjoying the book <3