Not alone anymore

Chapter 18

The alarm on my phone goes off at 7:15 am the next morning. I was awake all night. I mostly cried and got pissed. Why does this shit have to happen to me, to us?  I can't think of this anymore. That's all that ran though my head all night. I have a shift at Granny's at 9. I get up and undress because I laid in bed all night with my clothes on. Even my boots. I have my boxers and a t-shirt on and I step out of the guest room to go and take a shower. I see Zelena on my way to the bathroom. "They blondie. What ya doing in the guest room?"  I sarcastically chuckle.  "Well it seems your sister wants us to take a break. She's giving up on us, but I'm not. She told me to go back to Granny's so I packed and said nope. I'm not leaving. If she wants time she can have it but I'm not leaving her till she tells me it's really over, because until then I'm not giving up Zelena. You tell her that. I have to go to work and need to shower. I'll see ya around".  I go in the bathroom and slam the door. I'm still just pissed off. When I'm all done I go in the bedroom and change into my work clothes and shoes. I'm so damn tired but I need to work. Granny is counting on me. I walk out of the bedroom and down the hall. I see Regina's bedroom door is open but I don't see her. I walk downstairs and hear voices in the kitchen. I just grab my keys and leave to go to work.
I'm about an hour early which surprises Granny. I told her that I won't punch in yet. I just wanted to get an early start. I go stock up everything I can find to do. All the napkin holders are full along with all the salt, pepper and sugar holders. I cleaned and reset all the available tables, cleaned all the menus and swept the floors. Once the dinning area was done I went into the kitchen to checked on the cooks and asked what they needed to restock. They said everything was still full since it was only 8:30. I go into the walk-in refrigerator and sweep up the floor. I then start to rearrange all the shelves. It was kinda redundant because it's always clean and organized. I opened the freezer door and it's the same. I close the door and walk back to the break room. I wash my hands and sit in a chair and put my head in my hands. Granny walks in a moment later and closes the door. She sits in the chair next to me. "Emma dear. What's going on?"  I look up at Granny and just start crying. "I'm sorry Granny".  I shake my head and look down. I'm so exhausted. She moves her chair closer to me. She rubs my back. "Tell me what's wrong my dear".  I shrug and say. "It's awful Granny". I open my mouth to talk more but I can't. "It's ok my girl. Let it out when you can".  After a few minutes I got myself together and told Granny everything. "Emma I'm glad you didn't leave. I believe that was definitely the right move. Regina is obviously going through something right now and needs time".  "I know. That's why I said she can take all the time she needs".  I take a few breaths and ask. "Granny may I confide something in you?"  "Emma you can tell me anything. Please go ahead".  My eyes start to full with tears. "Granny when I was packing my clothes I said that's it. I'm so done. If she wants to give up that easy then I'll let her. Then all of a sudden something switched in my head and said don't go because you will never come back.  I new exactly what that meant. It meant that I was giving up on us as well and I can't do that. I really, truly love Regina. I moved into the guest room. I don't want want to give up Granny but I don't know what to do. She's so broken and many parts of me are broken. Can we actually make it together?"  Granny rubs my back and says. "Emma I'm sorry I can't answer that for you. You and Regina have to figure this out. Why don't you take today off and go home to talk to her".  "No thanks Granny. I'm only here till 3 anyway. I'm tired but I'm not ready to deal with home stuff yet.  I promise I'll still do a good job".   "I have no doubt about that Emma and I'll will pay you from the moment you came in this morning. You've cleaned and stocked everything and should get paid for it".   "Granny thanks but you don't have to. I was early because I didn't want to stay home".   "Emma your getting paid and after the lunch rush you are leaving.  You need sleep my girl. 2 o'clock you are out of here. Got it?"   I give her a little smile. "Yeah I got it Granny. Thank you for always being there for me". We hug and she says. "Now get to work. Your late". She laughs a little. "It's your fault". I say with a little smile as I run out of the room. We get through the lunch rush just fine. I waited on tables, helped out in the kitchen and did whatever needed to be done just to keep busy. A few minutes before I was about leave Regina walked in and sat at the counter. Which of course was where I was stationed. Damn it. I wiped down the area and put a place mat and some silverware out for her.  "Hey Regina. What can I get you?"  I say as I'm holding an order book and pen. "Coffee please Emma".  "Ok coffee coming right up". I fill a cup up for her. I put the sugar and a cream cup in front her and ask. "Would you like something to eat? Here is a list of our specials and soups for today".  I hand the paper to her and she looks it over as I look at her. She looks so beautiful. I love her so much. I hope she gets over whatever it is soon.  "I'll have the Italian wedding soup and a Caesar salad please. My love".  Fuck. Of course she had to end with that. I swallow hard and say.  "It'll be right up".  I walk quickly into the kitchen and start breathing heavy. Shit this woman.  Once I get my head together I get her soup and go out to give it to her, along with some crackers.  "Here ya go. Would you like anything else?"   "Yes actually I would. I'd like to talk to you".   "I can't right now I'm working Regina. Maybe tonight when I get home". I start to walk back into the kitchen and she stops me. "Emma wait. I'm sorry. Please we need to talk".   "I know Regina but right now is not the time. Later. Please".   She nods and says.  "Could I please get that salad to go, with the dressing on the side, please?"   "Sure. I'll put that in now".  I give her a small smile and go back into the kitchen. I give the cooks the slip and go stand out of the way. I don't know if I'm ready to hear what she has to say. I don't want it to be over. I hear the cooks ring the bell and say. "Emma orders up".  I go get Regina's salad and put it, the dressing and a few rolls in a bag to go. I see Ruby walk into the kitchen. "Rubes please help me. Please go out and give this to Regina along with the tab. Tell her my shift ended and that I left. The tip is yours. Please Rubes do this for me".  "Ok Ems but I want an explanation soon".  I nod and walk into the back room that leads into the break area. I grab my stuff and leave through the back door. I get in my car and drive away. I went over to the park and just sat there in my car. A few minutes later my phones rings and it's Regina. I didn't want to answer it but I did.
"Hello?"
"Emma where are you?"  Her voice is soft.
"I'm in a parking spot at the park".
"I'm at home. Could you please come home so we can talk".
"Regina I'm scared to come home. I'm afraid of what you may say. I love you and I don't want you to give up on us".  I started crying and she asked. "Emma may I come see you?" 
"If that's what you want Regina I won't say no".
"Ok my love I will be there soon. Please don't leave". 
"I won't".
We end the call and I just sit there in my car waiting for the worst. I few minutes later Regina pulls into the spot right next to me. She gets out of her car and opens my passenger door and gets in.
"Hello Emma".  I don't look at her.
"Hey".  Is all I say.
"Emma I owe you a big apology. I wasn't thinking correctly last night. I can't blame everything on my mother but I let my own fears cloud my love for you and that was so wrong. I hope somehow you can try to forgive me so we can move on from this. I really do love you Emma".
I take in her words and sit quietly for a moment.
"You still love me?"  I ask in a low voice.
"I do Emma with all my heart. Please say we can work this out?" 
I nod but don't look at her.
"I want this to work Regina but I'm not ready to go back to the bedroom with you just yet. I was so hurt when you asked me to leave in the middle of the night. It felt like you were just throwing us away. Like it was the easiest thing for you, but I couldn't leave you because I love you. I think we need more time to talk and work things out".
"I respect that. Will you be coming home?"
"Yes I will. If that's ok?" 
"It's more than ok Emma. We can take this one day at a time".
I look at her at we actually smile at each other.
"Emma may I kiss you before I go back home?"
"I don't think that'll be a bad thing. Sure".
She leans in and puts her lips to mine and that was it. Nothing more, just a simple kiss, but it still felt good.
"I'll see you at home my love".
I smile and nod.
"I'll be right behind you....Babe".
She gives me a smile at the nickname. She closes the door and gets into her car and we both start our engines. She backs out of the spot first and I followed right behind her. We got home and walked in together. Zelena must have heard the door open and close because she came walking into the foyer.
"Oh thank goodness you two are here together. I honestly don't think I could listen to you ramble on anymore Regina". 
I laugh and look at Regina. Zelena walks away and goes into the kitchen.  
"I'm gonna go take a shower to wash off my work day ok?"  
"Ok dear. I'll get started on dinner". 
I nod and go upstairs. I get my clothes and go take a shower. After I'm all done and dressed I sit on the bed in the guest room. I'm not really sure what to do. I hear a knock on the door and say.
"Come in".  It was Regina that opened the door.
"Sorry to bother you dear but dinner is ready".
"Ok thanks. I'll be right down". 
She nods and closes the door. I stand up and take a deep breath. I say to myself.
"Ok I can do this. We love each other and we want to try to move on so let's go".
It's just a little thing to psych myself up. I go downstairs and into the dinning room. I sit in my usual seat. Regina is at the head of the table and I'm at her left and Zelena is across from me on her right.  Regina takes off the top of the dinner dish and it's on of my favorites. Chicken, broccoli, fettuccine Alfredo.
"I hope you like it Emma. I made it just for you". 
"Regina I always love when you make this for me. Thank you so much. It looks delicious".  She smiles and starts to give out our plates. I start to eat and it's so damn good.
"Wow Regina thank you. It's absolutely delicious".   Zelena chuckles at my words but Regina looks so lovingly in my eyes. The 3 of us continue eating then we help out clearing and cleaning the table. We bring everything into the kitchen and load up the dishwasher and put the leftovers in a container to cool before and then we went to watch a movie in the living room. I fell asleep before the movie was even half over. Regina woke me up later and said it's time for bed. I stretched and stood up. We both shut the lights off and checked the locks. We walked upstairs together and I gave her a kiss in front of her bedroom.
"Good night Regina. Thanks so much for dinner. I'll see you in the morning".
She seemed disappointed with my words but I'm not ready to sleep in her room yet.
"Good night my love. Please sleep well".
We kiss again and I walk to my guest room and close the door. I change and get into bed. I fall asleep almost instantly. I was just so tired.