Clone trooper stories

The great blue ink catastrophe

Authors note: this was requested by 31LouisTomlinson31 hope you enjoy.

Jesse gave his brother a hysterical look.

" I would rather chew my leg off" he scoffed.

Fives pouted pointing to the support beams "it's not that high, come on I need your help to fill the fire alarms with ink before Nara and kyber bring in the cadets for training" he whined.

Jesse's eyes widened "do you have a deathwish Kyber would rip you in half and Nara is basically a trained assassin! Either way you're screwed when they find you and I want no part of that" he sighed.

"Well if you're scared I could always get hardcase to do it, he is my favourite brother after all" he sighed turning on his heel to leave.

"Wait"! Jesse exclaimed.

"Yes" Fives mused.

"Could you say that again I need to record it for Echo" Jesse mused.

Fives eyes widened " maybe you have a death wish" he muttered .

Jesse crossed his arms in frustration "why did you ask me in the first place I'm sure spades, Jex, or Rex, Even General Skywalker would have been a better choice" Jesse stated.

"Jex got in trouble with Fang for glitter bombing the barracks, spades is afraid of heights and he already said no to me. General Skywalker was busy with "senator duties" again, and Rex would kill me. Fives stated.

"What about Clancey and dollar Flu?" Jesse questioned.

"You kidding me they're in league with the Valkyries" Fives scoffed "no they would be two obvious you're the only choice".

" You're not gonna drop this, are you?" Jesse sighed.

"Nope!" Fives smirked popping the p.

"Ugh Fine!" Jesse growled.

"Yes"! Fives exclaimed, jumping in the air.

"But if I die you have to explain to Rex why poor Jesse didn't make it to arc trooper status before he was thirteen"! Jesse threatened pushing a finger a fives chest plate.

"You have my word" Fives saluted cheekily.

Jesse rolled his eyes and playfully shoved his brother " let's get to work then"

*1 hour later brought to you by hardcase driving a super tank through the mess hall again*

"Fives hurry up you shavit we have fifteen mintutes" Jesse grumbled feeling fives feet dig deeper into his shoulders. Fives wobbled slightly, dropping a screw out of his hand .

"Jesse if you stood still maybe we could have been finished sooner"! Fives hissed. Jesse tried to shift his weight around until he heard the creaking of the metal beam beneath him.

"Fives don't move" Jesse whispered.

"WHAT"? Fives yelled down moving around as he dropped another screw.

"I said don't move" Jesse yelped .

"Hey Jesse I've got to move" Fives yelled down.

"No don't move I said don't move" Jesse squeaked.

"Yep I'm gonna move" Fives shifted his weight back making Jesse lose his balance and stumble onto one of Fives lost screws. Fives only had four seconds before Jesse stumbled off of the beam. Fives was lucky he had five lives because poor Jesse fell ten feet to the ground onto a pile of pipes. He hit the side causing a landslide of the long pipes to crush both of his lower legs. There was an audible pop and the growl of a really angry Jesse who cursed fives name to high heaven.

"THIS IS WHY REX DOESN'T KRIFFIN LOVE YOU"! Jesse screamed.

Fives bit back his laughter knowing full well he was screwed.

"I also can't feel my legs, you di'kuit I hope Rex gives you a slow and painful death"! Jesse snarled as he growled out in pain.

"Oh were so totally doomed" Fives groaned jumping onto the support beam and making his way down to the ground level where Jesse was currently buried.

He inspected the scene before gulping " hey Jesse is your leg supposed to bend like that" Fives grinned sheepishly.

"Yah it's just as broken as my patience for you" Jesse growled behind clenched teeth.

"Well you don't have to be so rude" Five frowned.

"Will you just be quiet and call Kix already my legs hurt" Jesse whined.

"Now why would I do that?" Fives stated " he's a doctor, he's the one that could kill me in the most painful way possible without even lifting a finger" Fives perplexed.

"Fives just call him or I'll tell Rex who mysteriously turned his shampoo and conditioner pink" Jesse huffed trying to pull a beam off his arm.

Fives gasped " you wouldn't dare"

"Try me" Jesse snarled.

"Fine but if I die you'll have to explain to echo and persephone why I was strangled to death by doctor smexy" Fives sighed.

"I don't think they'd mind" Jesse mumbled.

Fives shot his brother a warning look before pressing the com on his wrist.

"Kix..."

"Save it, I'm already on my way with medical supplies and a stretcher" Kix sighed on the other line.

Fives frowned "How did you?"

"Let's be honest, Fives you were bound to cause an accident sooner than later" Kix said bluntly .

"Ok but that doesn't explain how you knew something happened" Fives asked.

"Jesse turned on his distress beacon. I assumed you were with him" Kix stated.

Fives turned to his brother and shot him a pained look of betrayal,Jesse only shrugged "hey I wasn't about die because of your crazy antics"

Fives sighed "how long do I have before Rex finds out"

"I'd give it five seconds" kix mused.

"ARC-27-5555 Fives"!

"I'd say you have two seconds now" Kix static voice mused over the com channel.

In burst Rex his eyes filled with anger and disappointment as he saw Fives sheepishly standing by Jesse who gave a weak nodded from under the heavy pipes.

"Hey Mom"

"Care to explain gentleman , why I was woken up from my nap to Kix telling me that you two had caused an accident, again" Rex sighed angrily.

"Yah I'll give you one word, hint it starts with an F" Jesse piped up.

Fives eyes widened as he put a pained hand on his chest

"You shavit"!

*Three hours later brought to you by spades winning a game of strip poker against General Skywalker*

"And here we are gentlemen. These are the stations we will be working at" Nara instructed as she and kyber lead the men towards the training facilities.

"Once we get inside you will break out into a group of four" kyber added before pushing the doors to the gym open.

Nara's jaw dropped to the floor and kybers eye popped out of her head. Rex and Kix were struggling to remove the pipes off of what appeared to be Jesse, while Poor fives had been taped against a pole as he mumbled multiple curse words under his breath.

"Um care to tell me what's going on here"? Nara asked.

"My thoughts exactly" kyber frowned.

"Fives" the three men grumbled.

"Hey this isn't entirely my fault" Fives exclaimed.

Suddenly the water sprinklers went off spraying blue dye everywhere in a matter of seconds covering everyone from head to toe in blue ink. Poor fives shrunk back into himself as everyone's deadly gazes turned to face him.

"Ok I guess you could blame me for that" he said sheepishly.