Wild Ride Into Light (BxB)

Chapter 43

Wilder POV

I gulp. "Too late? Why?" I ask with a lump in my throat, rubbing my arm rather awkwardly.

Rick clears his throat and leans against the wall. "Well, I forced myself to get over you, since your message was loud and clear, and final I thought. I like someone else, you know here, now, and it has become something. I have a boyfriend."

Boyfriend? Here? Now? He's taken now? He got a boyfriend, so he's taken? As he's in a relationship? Is it Melvin?

Oh. Wow. Okay. Bloody hell, I feel sick.

And a little bit of embarrassment.

Actually, I'm a lot embarrassed. Like, mortified embarrassed.

What did I just do? Confess my stupid feelings to a taken man? Oh, this is bad. The urge to run out of the door is very, very strong. Any opening could do, the door is a little too far away. I could jump out the window, that's closer.

"Hey, you okay there?" Rick's soft voice cuts my thoughts off.

"Yeah, sure" I say, nodding. "Sorry, I didn't know. Of course you've moved on, and I think that's great. So, uh, can we just forget what I just foolishly said?"

"Yes, I mean, I kind of have to. I have Nasir now."

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Despite the tension I feel all the damn time, which the lucky bastard isn't feeling since he's seemingly indeed over me, everything goes pretty smoothly. That is, until I get to take a shower, which is much needed since I've been sweating from nerves a lot today, before bed and as I exit the bathroom with only a towel on, Rick comes up the stairs with his big dog.

He stops to a halt seeing me, and my cheeks warm up noticing him trying not to check me out and quite unsuccessfully. I'm not shy, but today with him...I am.

I force myself not to do or say anything wrong, so I clear my throat and step back to let him pass to his bedroom. Why couldn't he already be a good boy and be in there, like his roommate is in his room? It's late, like past 9 PM. I can't handle these awkward situations.

"Good night, Wilder" Rick says blankly and I just barely have the time to wish him the same before he, quietly but still, slams his door shut.

Well. This is going so well. How could I have known I shouldn't have come? I didn't! Thought I'd make things right, but I obviously always fail when I try to do the right thing.

I huff, go to the guest bedroom and slam the door shut not so quietly, not caring. This is no way to treat a guest! I don't think we're going to succeed in being just friends, so I'm thinking this is it. After tomorrow, I won't see Rick again.

And these thoughts hurt, physically hurt my heart like a bitch. But it's my fault. I sent him back home to find that other guy with an odd name who he likes now.

I kick off the towel from around my waist and step into my pyjama pants, but before I get to pick up my t-shirt from the floor where I dropped the night outfit before shower, the door is knocked on. With a frown, I take a few steps to open it and in barges Rick in all his fuming glory.

"You know, you had no right to come here after what you did" he says angrily in a shushed voice, and I see fit to close the door.

"I'm...you said -"

"No, I'm doing the talking right now" he cuts me off, causing me to nod and cross my arms. "You did the idiotic choice to leave, and now I've been finally better and happy, over your bratty arse. You have no idea how broken I was, and now here you are again, ripping open all the wounds that almost needed no stitches anymore. So, how dare you come here to tell me you love me suddenly, that you're now returning or ever returned the feelings I held for you back then?"

"I just- just had to tell you I love you" I mutter, feeling ever so guilty and stupid and especially admitting it again. "I'm sorry, you don't have to ever see me again after tomorrow morning."

"Well, you have no right to love me anymore, I'm good with Nasir and that's how- things are, where we stand" he says determinedly.

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"I hope you go back home tomorrow and suffer, like you put me through" he says through gritted teeth.

"Well, it seems that will happen, and I hope so, too."

"What? Why?"

"Because it's whatever, I deserve it. To live and know I failed this, us, and learn to live without you. Okay, I lost you. I don't really care about myself, it's just nice I got to see you're happy again."

He looks at me with wide eyes. "You- you, y-you..." he stops himself with a head shake and starts to dash for the door, but makes an u-turn that ends his route right in front of me and kissing me.

Like, a real kiss on the lips. I'm taken by surprise, so get backed against the wall as he's grabbed my head just the right amount of roughly. Almost losing my balance, he's stronger than any chick I've been with, I gasp and his tongue takes advantage of that before I know it.

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"Why? Oh, man, was I too rough on you after all?" He asks anxiously, caressing my cheek maybe without thinking. Yeah, he's clearly not thinking any kind of straight right now.

I shake my head. "Rick, no, that was good. But I can't do this as long as and since you're with that Nasir dude."

"Who?" He tilts his head. Oh, bloody hell, he's teasing me right now, right? Making me spell it out for him. As I'm opening my mouth in frustration, his eyes widen and he jumps back and almost stumbles getting off me. "Oh, Nasir! Him, yeah, uh, of course. Nasir, I'm with him. I like him. A lot. He's great and fun. We're right there him and I, you know, we click. So, thanks, this with us would have been wrong. Oh god, I cheated on him already. What are you still doing here, go to your room!"

I've sat up on the bed during his ranting and if I wasn't this hurt, I would be amused.

"Unless you're kicking me out after all, this is my room for tonight" I remark.

"Oh, right, well then, you stay here and I'll go to my room" he says and hurries out like a frightened deer.

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