how it feels to be alive {tom riddle}

thirty-nine: sober

SOBER

Lucia was out after curfew again.

It had been a long day of classes, and she was feeling particularly overwhelmed with the pressure that came with N.E.W.T. level assessments.

She sat under a tree outside the castle, the soft grass tickling her thighs gently as she gazed into the velvety navy sky.

She raised the bottle in her grasp to her lips, the potent taste and acidic burn having faded into a muted discomfort now.

The cool, night air seemed to be washing through her body, weaving through her ribs and ridding her of the infection of the stress of the day.

She had come to miss alone time such as this, having been surrounded by at least one other person for so long now. It was nice to just bask in silence.

The black lake looked like a pool of ink, with the choppy peaks created by the wind glistening on the surface like a crystal by a flame. Every now and then, the giant squid would disturb the relatively peaceful surface, a large tentacle brushing through the thin membrane-like layer on top of the water before being submerged in the depths once again.

The castle was still alight in some areas, giving a warm glow to some areas of the grounds. Lucia could see in the distance that there were prefects and professors filtering throughout the castle on duty. Hardly anyone patrolled outside though, so she was relatively safe where she was.

She took another sip of the bourbon, laying her head back into the grass and letting her eyes rest shut as she took in the distant sounds from around the large expanse of the Hogwarts grounds.

Only a few moments of serenity passed before the glow coming from the castle was blocked by something, causing Lucia to flutter her eyes open to see if the lights had just been put out.

A figure stood above her, dressed in a pair of simple black pants and a sweatshirt. He was a silhouette, but from the dark curls on top of his head she knew instantly who it was.

"Out after curfew again I see." Tom observed with a light chuckle. He was standing over her, just above her head and looking down at her.

Her golden hair was fanned out around her in the grass like a nimbus, in a way he knew too well in much less clothing.

"As are you." She retorted, brushing a stray hair from her face.

"Drinking?" He raised his eyebrows accusingly.

"Yes."

"I'm not going to pretend I'm surprised." He sighed.

"If you're going to lecture me you can fuck off back inside." Lucia rolled her eyes and looked away from him.

He took a moment of thought, then walked next to her and sat down on the grass. He pried the bottle from her grasp and sat it on his other side, then turned to lay beside her. His gaze was still looking down on her as he propped himself on his elbow to face her, but she was avoiding his eyes.

"Are you okay?" He asked gently.

"Just tired." She replied bluntly.

He brought one hand up to brush away a few stray hairs that were dancing across her face in the wind, and she finally met his eyes in the darkness.

"Why don't you like to be sober?" He questioned carefully, allowing his fingers to continue brushing over her cheek softly.

"I don't like the thoughts that come with it."

"It's not good for you, Lucia." He sighed, moving from being propped up on his elbow to lying flat next to her on his side.

"I know." She admitted.