Caught In Your Chaos ✓

Chapter Twenty Eight

My mind was a mess, totally cluttered. Never in my life, I felt so out of ideas. Even my imaginative self gave up on me. First, my actions disarrayed that night, and then, I was into another not-so-reasonable deal. Why Jake had to make it more difficult than it already was?

Now, you may think it was ridiculous. What's a big deal about a kiss? There wasn't when you think about it. More so when it was a mere attempt, not even a real heated kiss. The thing that troubled me was the attention. Since my high school days, I've been an anti-social person. Being in the spotlight was never my thing. Though I had grown comfortable over time, the thought of being talked about still made me anxious. And not to mention, if my parents knew, it would be a whole new drama.

Just reach your room and plot out an escape, I thought, covering the rest of my way back dorm at a fast pace.

The minute I entered my room, a deep sigh left through my lips. I so wanted to change into my pajamas and snuggle under the comforter. But my lucky star betrayed me yet again. The moment I stepped inside, I met with darkness. Only a faint moonlight from the window illuminated the room. Somehow I managed to locate the switchboard and switched on the lights.

I turned around and jumped a little to find Leah curled up in my bed. She was still in her party dress, meaning she didn't bother to change or freshen up. I took a glance at her bed, which was a total mess. Her clothes were scattered all over her bed, and the sheets were lying on the floor. Her table lamp was down into pieces. All the things from her table, including the books, were on the floor.

Did a hurricane hit her side of the room?

I picked up the scattered books and placed them back on the table. I might not be a cleaning freak. But when it comes to books, I can't see them getting disrespected. Leah sniffled in her sleep, which caught my attention. I sat next to her on the bed and pulled the blanket over her body. Her face had dried tears mixed with the black mascara smudged all over her face. She must be bawling again and even more, given the condition of the room. I stroked her hair lightly to comfort her. The way she was sniffling tightened my chest.

"Amy?" she opened her swollen eyes a little and spoke in a cracked voice.

"Hey there," I gave her a weak smile. "What happened, Leah?" I added, wiping away some of the fresh tears rolling down the corner of her eyes.

"He said to s-stay away from him," she broke into loud sobs, placing her head on my lap. The moment those words came out of her lips, I knew she was talking about Jake. A sudden wave of guilt shook me to the core. I tried to calm her down, stroking her back reassuringly, but I was shaking badly. I felt terrible looking down at my roommate, who was crying for a guy I tried to kiss.

"Do you think he will never l-love me?" she hiccuped. "Why does it hurt so much?" Her words cracked open my heart a little, and I released a shaky breath, and a lone tear rolled down my eyes. I quickly wiped it away before she could see my pathetic state. She kept crying on my lap while I sat there, shushing her down and stroking her soothingly. By then, her tears had already soaked my jeans, and I didn't mind a bit. After all, the guilt and regret were still clawing my soul.

"Try to get some sleep, Leah. We'll talk about it in the morning." I said, shifting her back on the bed. I tucked her in my comforter, yawning myself. 'It was already morning.' Just a few more hours. Thank god, it was a Sunday.

I looked towards her bed with droopy eyes. It didn't look very welcoming. I sat there for some time as a zombie, not knowing what to do before a soft voice called for me. I turned my head towards the source.

"Can you sleep beside me? I don't want to be alone." Leah asked, giving me a sleepy smile. Relief washed over me, and I quickly nodded. I didn't feel very well either, and my body needed the warmth of my bed.

"Sure, I will change into my PJ's and join you," I said, giving her a warm smile, and made my way towards the dresser. Putting on a pair of comfy pajamas, I turned off the light and climbed on the bed next to her. I pulled the blanket over my head in a desperate attempt to be away from all the chaos surrounding me.

But there was just one thing that I knew was impossible to escape; the fact that I could no way let Jake tell everyone about the kiss(or almost kiss). Because one, I would end up in the middle of the unnecessary spotlight, and two, the truth would hurt Leah, my roommate, my friend.