okay this is a filler but I explain why down below lol
...
Amelia
I slowly begin to stir awake to the feeling of fingertips being dragged up and down my bare spine. I hum, relishing in the gentle touch. It causes shivers to erupt all over my body, specifically in the trail Harry creates on my skin.
I allow my eyelids to flutter open, the sun seeping through the curtains nearly blinding me in the process. We should have used the black out blinds last night but we were too caught up in each other to really care at the time.
Harry had drawn us a bath last night, as per my request. It was simple and perfect, and something that I felt we both needed.
I was a little nervous at first because it was the first time that Harry saw my body since my breakdown to him about how little I think of myself. I was nervous that perhaps his eyes wouldn't fancy what they see, but he proved me wrong.
He wasn't lying when he said he would shower me with kisses and compliments because that is exactly what he did. After our bath was filled up, soapy bubbles nearly spilling over the edge, we helped undress each other. I was half tempted to make him look away like I did last time, but I opted not to. I needed to get over my fear of him seeing me and I figured the best way to do that would be to just dive right in, head first.
The bath itself was relatively stress free once I got over my initial worries. Harry held me flush against his chest while we were sat in the tub, and we just talked about ourselves and our life together.
I told him that I thought about moving while we were on our break. Harry was confused at first, but then I elaborated and explained that I'm not ready to move right now, but in the future I wouldn't mind discussing the possibility of moving to England with him full time. I know that's what he wants and although I would be incredibly home sick since I've never left my family behind before, it just seems like the logical thing to do.
Harry travels frequently and I feel like it's not fair for us to be stationed somewhere where he isn't a hundred percent comfortable. I think he likes New York, but he's not in love with it. He's only here for me and I can't live with that weight on my chest.
I thought about it a lot while on our break. Would I be comfortable moving to England? Is that what I really want or am I just saying that to appease Harry? It took me a while to come to the conclusion, but I decided that I would be happy there, especially with Harry by my side, as well as his family there to help ease any discomfort. I would want to be more established with my job, however, but with how things are going now, I'm not as worried as I was a couple months ago. Sure, things could fall through with my novel but so far there is a beacon of hope that I am holding on to.
I also came to the conclusion that the move didn't have to mean I would never come back to New York again. I could always fly back. There's nothing in my way stopping me from coming home to see my family, or having my family fly out to me. My ultimate goal, since Harry likes to provide for the both of us, is to save up enough money to be able to buy my family a small house in England, so that way when Harry and I do move, they could have their own little residence.
Harry didn't say much when I told him I wouldn't mind moving. Initially I thought it was because he was indifferent or unhappy, but I quickly came to find out it was because he was crying. I heard him sniffle in my ear as he pulled me closer to him and I felt his shaky breaths against my back.
After our bath, we meandered back into the bedroom. At the start of the night I didn't know if I was ready to take that next step with Harry sexually quite just yet, but my feelings changed as the night progressed. I realized that I was ready, and I could also tell Harry was too. It was a bit obvious, to say the least, but neither of us commented on it until I initiated the rest of the evening.
