Amelia
I sigh, setting my gaze out the window in front of me in a weak attempt to give Harry some privacy. I don't want to seem like a complete stalker by just staring at him while he talks to Robin's grave, which I noticed him doing a couple minutes ago. I had suggested it to him on the car ride over here and I was pleasantly surprised to see him actually taking me up on it. It might feel weird but I think it could be therapeutic. Maggie always told me talking out loud helps in certain situations. Although people might assume it means craziness, sometimes it's just a way to keep sane.
I watch for a few minutes as more and more clouds cover the blue sky, casting a grey haze over the ground below. Hopefully the rain holds out for the duration of our stay. The last thing Harry needs right now is to be rushed while he's finally at Robin's grave.
I look back over to my right and see Harry squatting down in front of Robin's grave. He bows his head slightly, looking distressed, and then all of a sudden he falls forward, collapsing to the ground.
My eyes widen at the sudden movement and before I can process my own thoughts, I unbuckle and open the car door, exiting the vehicle at record speed.
My feet carry me to the grave faster than my mind can keep up, and my heart pounds in my chest with each step I take. I have tunnel vision right now where the only thing I can focus on is getting to Harry, and that feeling only intensifies when I hear his cries grow louder and louder as I approach the grave.
"Harry," I whisper once I reach him.
He doesn't reply, but I wasn't expecting him to. He just continues to sob, grieving as the world finally crashes down around him.
Subconsciously, I think I knew this would happen. Harry took about two weeks to grieve immediately after Robin's death, but then it was seldom after that. He rarely spoke about it besides the occasional comment.
I kneel down next to him and place my arms around his body, struggling to lift him off of the grass. He resists me at first, but eventually, with some persistence, he climbs into my arms and allows me to hold him.
My own eyes leak with water as I hold Harry as tightly to myself as I physically can. He buries his face in the crook of my neck while he cries, his arms wound around my waist, holding onto me for dear life. He also violently shakes as adrenaline and grief washes over him, nearly drowning him in the process.
It's in this moment where I realize I don't know how to properly comfort him. I've never been through heartbreak like this. I've been fortunate enough to never have to go through the death of a loved one so I have no idea what Harry feels, or what he needs in this moment. Sure Robin and I were close, but it was nothing compared to the bond that him and Harry shared. I couldn't imagine losing someone close to me like that.
"Robin loved you, Harry," I tell my boyfriend, pulling him closer to me. His cries only amplify as he desperately clings to me, his body shaking unnaturally in a way that will surely tire him out for the next couple of days. "He loved you more than anything. You were a son to him, regardless if you were blood related or not. He always spoke so highly of you. He was so proud of the person you'd become. Being in your life was the highlight of his."
Harry gasps for breath, struggling to get any oxygen into his lungs. I take one of my hands and move it to his upper back, rubbing it in small, circular motions in an attempt to calm him down. I'm not sure if my words helped or not, but I think he deserves to hear them. He needs to know how much Robin cared for him, and he needs to know it's okay to grieve his loss.
"Harry, I need you to breathe with me, baby," I tell him, softly, the sounds of his sputtering amplifying at a rapid pace that causes me to grow concerned. "Just follow my count, okay? I need you to breathe, baby. Ready, inhale..1..2..3..4..hold..1..2..3..4..exhale..1..2..3..4..hold..1..2..3..4."
