Saved by a loving heart.

Pt1: Why?

⚠TRIGGER WARNING⚠

Suicide, Self Harm, Harsh Language, Eating Disorder.

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"Y/n, dinner will be in 10," you hear Clara call to you.

I don't see a point in telling me this it's not like I'm going come out let alone eat, I haven't for the majority of the time I've been here. Instead I will go shower. Gathering my clothes and walking as quietly as I can as to not draw attention to the fact  I was going towards the door in attempt to get out of dinner. It worked!

I turn the water on and start undressing, revealing your mutilated body. You have cuts all over upper body and bruises everywhere. I start to think why I do this to myself but without another second going by all the memories flood back of all the times you were told you weren't worth  it or that  you should just die. 

I get in the shower and try and take as long as possible so that the burning water gets into everyone of my fresh cuts and stings until they go numb. After all, I just want to be numb, to stop feeling everything and the only way to do that is die. 

I stop the water but just sit over the drain and cut. Reopening old wounds, creating more, and every time cutting deeper and deeper, After about 15 minutes of cutting everywhere from my arms to the inside of my legs. Wiping away as much blood off my boney body as I can, I put on my sweat pants and pull over my hoodie. Whipping my hair up into a messy bun I walk out of the bathroom to see the rest of the "family" sitting around the table digging into dinner.

While trying to get back to my room without disrupting everyone else I hear.

"Come on y/n, you've been in the shower for ages you have to come eat," Clara says sternly.

"I need to go finish my Engl---," 

"No. You are coming to eat at the fucking dinner table with everyone else. You either haven't been home or you have been in your room every dinner time. You are coming to eat with us. I'm done with your shit." 

I flinch at the tone Clara used, it sounded like the other families right before they would start beating me. I have never heard her raise her voice to anyone in this house, not even Ella who screams at her to go away and always seems to be fighting with. This took me by scared me, so place my cloths on the stairs and walk into the dinning room, where everyone else was sitting just as shocked by Clara as I was.

After 20 minutes of everyone sitting around the table we were all told we could leave the table and without thinking twice I go back to the bathroom to throw up what I just ate. Even thought it was only a small portion of salad, I didn't deserve it. Gathering myself together and run up to my room. I can't stand to be close to anyone right now.

After being in my room for 30 minutes I can't take it anymore. I kept cutting in my room just to try and distract myself from what happened and to punish myself for eating, but it just wasn't doing it. I had to do more, today was the day.

I pack the very few things I had into my bag and tidy my room until it was spotless. I take one good look and climb out the window, leaving everything and every memory behind me.

I wander the streets of London in the dark and because I only know my path to school, so I walk in the opposite direction in hopes  to find a bridge, and without too much effort I stumble across a quiet bridge, just tall enough. 

I wait and look around until all the walkers are gone.

Then I climb onto the edge and start to feel the cool London breeze whip against my face. I look around one last time to make sure no one was around.

But right before you jump you feel a hand. It was warm and soft, and it gently squeezed my hand. I turn around to push them away when they embrace me  in a hug. My heart starts racing but the sound of the heart next to me almost immediately calmed me down.

I start to hug them back  and through the tears streaming down my face I just see yellow.

Why? Why care? Why me?

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I hope everyone is good and is staying safe.

Thank you for reading this chapter. It means a lot to me.❤

Please remember I love you.  

-A