A New Life

Chapter 14

It's been two weeks since the doctor called.

I haven't gone into work, I haven't answered calls or texts, not even from my own mother.
I can't stop crying. The pains are going, but I'm going back to get some more pain killers.
They are the only things that help me get any sleep at night. I feel like I can't have enough showers, but I hate going into the bathroom. I decided, I was going to cover the mirrors in my house. I dont want to look at the reflection.

I call and ask for another script and leave to pick it up. I decide to stop by the liquor store too. Why not right?
I pick up the script and a couple bottles of vodka and head home.

I take a drink to wash down the medication and go lie down on the couch. I start to cry and wait until I can sleep.

----------------------------------------------------

Three weeks pass, Ive been into work a couple times, not staying any later than 3pm.
I get home, and go straight to the fridge. I take out my nearly empty bottle of vodka, pour some into a glass and take down a few pain killers. This is the only way I get through my day. It stops the pain, it stops the thoughts. It helps me. I throw on a hoodie, that seems to be getting bigger on me, I put tights on and head upstairs.

I must have fallen asleep because when I wake up from some banging coming from downstairs, the room is dark. I look outside my window. It's night time. I look at my phone, 9pm. There's a tone of missed calls and text messages. I swipe them away, not even bothering to look at them.
The banging continues.
I get up, "Okay, I'm coming. Geez" I call out.
When I get to the door, I hesitate. I look through the peep hole. Holy shit.
It can't be. Has time really gone that fast?!
"Katy. I know you're there. Open up." I hear his voice say calmly. I step back. "Katy, open the door please. I need to see you. Please." he called out again, with urgency in his voice.
I can't do this right now. I turn and walk to the kitchen, the knocking continuing.
I pour myself a glass of vodka, using the rest up. "Katy! Please! Open the fucking door!" he yells out. Just like that the tears start coming back. I go over, unlock the door but don't open it. I pull my hood up and walk back to the kitchen looking for my pain killers. They have to be some where.
The door opens.

"Katy, what's going on? Why have you been ignoring us? What are you doing?" Chris asks, stepping inside.
"I'm sorry, I've just been uhhh, busy. I'm just looking for something. Can you come back another day?" I say still trying to find my pill bottle. "No I can't, we need to talk." Ahh my bag maybe? I walk past him, not looking up at him, straight to my bag. No. I sigh. Fuck.
Maybe upstairs? I start for the stairs when... "KATY! Stop fucking ignoring me. What are you doing?" Chris' voice raises, stopping me in my tracks. He notices, and walks over. He touches my shoulder and all I could do was flinch and pull away from him. The tears start falling down my face even more than they already were." I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..." I can hear the sadness in his voice. "I'll come back tomorrow... Okay?" and with that, he leaves.

I go upstairs, find my bottle, go back down and swallow them down with the rest of the vodka.
Welcome home Chris.