Through the Dark (Sequel to Taking Chances)

Chapter Twenty: "Lost"

So I know I said I'd try to make the next chapter longer, but this one just sort of shrunk, so...
Also not edited...
Still please don't hate me!
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Niall
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It was almost as if I wasn't really listening to him. His voice was there, the words rang in my ears, but I couldn't understand what it was he said. I didn't want to.

I knew I'd fall apart if I allowed myself to believe this had truly reached the breaking point. So it made sense that I lived in denial about whether Brielle was doing okay. Everything was riding on how she was doing.

Harry paused, waiting for my reaction, disbelieving of the expression I wore. He continued to watch me, his eyes following every move I made. He was wary, hesitant.

"I have to see her."

His eyes met mine in that moment, apprehension now clear. He thought he understood my behavior now. He thought he'd figured out the answer.

"Niall, you can't." He stood as I pulled the sheets back. For a split second the cold air attacked me, but the sheet was placed back over my legs.

"I need to see her, Harry."

"You're in no condition to be walking around. You've been out for a week, you need to rest," he said.

"I've been resting for an entire week," I protested as calmly as I could. But my heart was pounding and my breathing clipped in panic. "I need to see her. Where is she?"

"You can't, Niall-"

"-No, let me go."

I fought him trying to get up, the anxiety and panic growing in seconds. I couldn't stand being here when she was probably alone somewhere else. It was eating me alive, knowing this was my fault. I caused this. I put her through this. And the guilt was going to bring me down before I could fix any of it.

"Niall, you have to lie down-"

"-It's my fault she's here!"

He stopped when my voice boomed through the room. I almost wondered if it'd echoed.

"She's in there, asleep, not waking up, because of me! I was speeding and we were arguing and I wasn't paying attention. We crashed because of me!"

My breathing was frantic, my body aching. The exhaustion was weighing me down, now harder than when I first got up. But I spent so much energy on fighting Harry to get to Brielle that it seemed more necessary to just lie back down. Although the need to see her still heavily on me.

Harry sat back down, his expression solemn. It was hard seeing him like that. He blinked at me.

"What were you arguing about?"

I sulked down into the thin mattress, defeated.

"Everyone worries about her. She doesn't understand why. We were arguing about her life."

He closed his eyes. "What do you mean?"

I let out an exhausted sigh as I allowed myself to calm. Now it was just the guilt that buried me.

"She's changing, Harry. She resembles Liam in some ways, and it scares the hell out of me. I talk to her about it, but she dodges me and gets angry. She doesn't see it... and I think we're losing her."

He looked to me in pure disbelief.

"How does she resemble Liam?"

"She does what she thinks is right, she is angry and sad most of the time. If something bad comes up, she'll do whatever she has to do to get rid of it. Even if it's bad. And she won't let anyone look after her. She's dying inside... and no one can reach her in time to save her."