Shall We? | NCT Lee Jeno ff

Chapter 14 - Hyun Nam

She didn't have to feel like that. But for some reason she did.

"Come in! Everyone, Hyun Nam's here!" Winter shouted to everyone in the practice room. By the sound of her voice, Hyun Nam could know that there were not only 1 or 2 people in there. When she pulled Hyun Nam inside the room, she saw NCT Dream and Aespa sitting on the floor. Some of them were laying down and some were just sprawled on the floor, maybe napping. Hyun Nam's eyes directly spotted Jeno still laughing with Mark but stopped as he saw his friend coming into the room. Like Hyun Nam's eyes, Jeno's eyes averted his gaze to the elephant in the room, Kang Dae. He quickly looked away, avoiding any eye contact with the guy standing beside Hyun Nam.

"This is Kang Dae," Jaemin patted Kang Dae on the back while the rest stood up to meet him, though Mark was still asleep on the floor. Hyun Nam wanted to look away, she didn't want to meet Jeno's eyes. She was scared, but why? But this was a moment she was waiting to see: Jeno and Kang Dae standing face to face. Although Kang Dae is still taller than him (Jaemin and Jeno being the same height), Jeno had a more... thinner but oddly stouter body. Kang Dae looked like an athlete while Jeno looked like a mixture of both an athlete and a model. Hyun Nam cringed at herself for thinking about Jeno's physique and comparing it to a model. Fortunately, the meeting was starting in 10 minutes. Hyun Nam had an excuse to leave the room, getting Kang Dae away from Jeno.

"I have a meeting at 10," Hyun Nam said while they were talking to Kang Dae, getting to know the man. Honestly, she could've sworn someone was being flirtatious, but she ignored it. However, she didn't see Jeno talking to Kang Dae, she searched the whole room for him before seeing him talk to the choreographer and practicing at the opposite end of the room. He caught his eye from the mirror before he shifted his eyes back to the choreographer.

"Can I have your phone number?" Winter smiled, tapping Hyun Nam's shoulder. It's been a while since she met Winter, her beauty up close would always stun Hyun Nam.

"Oh, yes of course," Hyun Nam stuttered and struggled to find her phone, Winter found it cute so she was giggling while Hyun Nam nervously took out her phone. After exchanging phone numbers, the rest finally gave up Kang Dae and left them alone so they could leave. "I'll call you," Winter beamed. Hyun Nam stole a glance to see Jeno's goodbye but he never said anything until they left, she was only given a small smile from his reflection.

There was a knock on the door that night. Hyun Nam was sitting on her window sill, having a book in her hand. One she took from her secret library a few days ago. She hid it under the pillow next to her before anyone beyond that door could see.
"Tell me all about them," Mother giggled and came into the room. A part of Hyun Nam relaxed knowing it wasn't Father.

"I met Jeno first at the conference but we began talking when I met him at a library nearby-"

"Then?"

"You won't tell dad will you?"

Mother laughed and shook her head.

"Okay, then we got closer and we began to eat at the bakery on some mornings."

"I should come sometimes."

"Don't, mom. Please."

Mother laughed again.

"Then for Jaemin, I met him at Aespa's concert I attended and actually talked to him when I met both of them for the first time at the bakery," Hyun Nam continued the story. She told Mother the funniest stories Jeno told Hyun Nam. From the one, he got lost in Jeju, separated from the group, and when he accidentally followed a different boy group on stage.

"This Jeno guy sounds clumsy. He's also very charming in real life," Mother smiled and squeezed Hyun Nam's shoulder. He is.

"Well, whatever you do. I just want you to know that you have to guard your heart because men can sometimes be-"

"Mom! It's not like that, they're just my friends!" Hyun Nam's face was flushed.

"Oh yes, yes. Your friends. But I'm saying this not only for now but also for the future. Guard this beautiful heart of yours. You've cared for it for years and years, I've guarded it with my life, too. Don't let it break just because of a man. Okay? Promise me because I may not be here to protect you when you meet someone you love," Mother sighed and hugged Hyun Nam suddenly. Her mother was swallowed by emotions, Hyun Nam was caught off-guard by the sudden gesture.

"Oh Mom, don't say that. I promise you that I'll introduce the guy I love in the future, way before you're gone," Hyun Nam smiled, starting to hug her mother back. Deep down Hyun Nam knew that promise was almost impossible, she didn't know when she'd ever even date someone with the dating ban her father had set up for her. Hyun Nam didn't know that her mother knew the lie as well. Besides, she didn't have anybody in her life she's in love with. Nobody at all.

"Good night, I love you," Mother finally said and closed the door behind her, her footsteps disappearing until Hyun Nam heard the sound of a door opening and closing in the distance. Hyun Nam couldn't sleep. Not because it was still 11 pm, which was early for Hyun Nam, but it was because she couldn't get her previous conversation with her mom out of her head. The part she was thinking about wasn't the part where her mom might not be there when she finds someone she loves. No, it wasn't that (though that hurt her too). She never thought about this question, never in her life. She has never been given an opportunity to. The only way she made contact with such a complicated matter is through her books. Would she find love? Ever? She wasn't begging to meet the love of her life. Not at all. She's quite content with her books, studies, and work. But wouldn't it be nice to have someone in her life that she might have a chance to share all those moments with? All the songs they would sing together. All the dances they would dance. All the morning kisses they would give each other. All the morning breakfasts they would cook. All the books they'd read together. All the hugs they would share as they fix each other and clean their past bruises. Will she find someone? Find someone who she dearly loved and cared for. Someone she would yearn to see every day. Someone that would make her ache if they don't hold her hand. Someone who she wanted to feel all the same joy she feels when she's with them.

Will she ever? It was one of those impossible questions you just don't have an answer to, too. And it frustrated her a bit that she didn't know an answer to such a simple question. 

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