51. Transparency

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    Cosette spent the better part of her day flipping through the contents of Fred's journal. Some entries were short and sweet.

    05-19-94

I caved and asked Setty to make a study guide for me for the OWL's

07-15-94

Went into the city with Setty and she showed me a few of her favorite muggle cafe's. I wanted to pay but I don't understand muggle currency at all

Some entries seemed more like unfinished thoughts.

06-01-94

I think I lost my potions textbook

08-22-94

George thinks that if we mix bitter root and Kneazle hair we might be able to make that potion work

Cosette panicked for a moment when she read that line because she was fully aware that mixing bitter root with any type of component from a warm-blooded creature was potentially dangerous.

She wished that she had the chance to pick his mind and question him about what he wrote. An image flashed through her mind. Not a memory for once, but a lost vision. What could have been.

She pictured herself going through his closet, probably trying to organize it or clean it when she would have stumbled across these journals. Of course, curiosity would have gotten the better of her and there was no doubt in her mind that she would have spent the rest of the day reading them and questioning him about each and every entry.

Cosette could see herself sprawled across his bed with her head in Fred's lap, probably teasing him for things he wrote when he was younger. Fred would pluck the journal out of her hands when he didn't want to explain something or if he was embarrassed.

It was something so simple, but Cosette could envision it so clearly in her mind.

She could have had that.

Two months ago, a thought like that would have made her break down in tears. Thinking about the what if's was never easy but it certainly wasn't as hard as it used to be.

Cosette closed the journal and tossed it on the mattress next to her. She pushed herself off the bed and made her way out of the room to check on her dad. Even with the door only open a crack, she could hear him snoring away so she quickly shut it and went back across the hall.

Her bag had been left unpacked, having gotten distracted the second she found Fred's journal. Instead of letting it sit at the end of her bed, she figured now was as good a time as any to make herself more at home.

The top drawers in her dresser were empty but the second row was filled with clothes she used to wear when she was a teenager and the bottom row carried her old school uniforms that most likely didn't fit her anymore.

Since she didn't pack much, most of what she brought fit into the dresser but she continued to look around the room to see what else had been leftover from her move.

Old textbooks that no longer benefited her lined a bookshelf, along with novels that she used to read growing up. Her fingers slowly traced over the spines of the books before she moved on to browse through her closet.

Her Yule Ball dress was the first thing she saw when she pulled open the door. The familiar Periwinkle blue material of the skirt made her smile. She pushed the hanger to the center of the closet and scanned over the intricate floral design stitched into the mesh top.

Cosette thought about putting this dress on again, but she knew that her hips had widened since she purchased it and she recalled how emotional she was when she gained a few pounds before the ball and thought she wouldn't fit into it. After nearly seven years, Cosette knew she gained a lot more than just a few pounds and decided against playing dress up.

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