Cuddle Buddies - Niko Vilhelm Moilanen | Blind Channel

Interview

So I decided to tell no wrong things but also to not fully open up and just telling a few things that define me.

„Well, you were right when you said that my personality is quite different from Tommi's and probably also from your's. As you can imagine, Tommi and I didn't meet in a situation that had anything to do with music.

I moved when I was in year seven because of my father's job and when I entered the classroom, there was only one free chair. And of course, this chair was next to Tommi. I'm a person who often starts conversations with new people around me, so I started talking to Tommi. We got to know each other, spent breaks and later also afternoons together and became quite close friends. In most books we would have become a couple, but no, we just became very good friends."

I laughed a little when I thought about the cliché. Niko seemed to know this so often told story as well since he also grinned. I guess everyone has heard about it. At least everyone who reads books or fanfictions...

„Tommi was always there for me, he was like my teddybear that always took care of me, it didn't matter in which trouble I've brought myself. Well, admittedly, most of my problems were harmless. I've always been that kind of daughter that parents want to have – at least the kind my parents wanted to have. I've had great marks at school, I've rarely been in trouble, I didn't have a boyfriend in young ages, I don't party a lot and so on and so forth. I've always been and I guess I still am that totally calm, innocent kind of guy that parents are proud of and that you expect to be happy because of the missing trouble."

I was getting faster while talking since I realized that I said a lot and didn't want to miss the important part but at the same time didn't want to bore Niko. We haven't known each other for a long time, so it was totally stupid to tell him the whole story of my life. Well, of course I didn't do that but I told him a lot more than I had planned. Especially with the one small but crucial word: expect. People expect me to be happy. Emphasizing that probably showed, that I was at least not always that happy.

And of course Niko didn't miss that! On the contrary, he points it out again: „The type of guy people expect to be happy? That sounds like you aren't that happy with who you are. Or even who you pretend to be? It sounds like you're at least not fully comfortable with being that 'innocent girl'... I'm sorry if I'm hitting a sore point. You don't have to answer, of course!"

Yes, he hit a sore point. With his last question, to be exact. I wouldn't say that the personality I was showing is a person I pretended to be, but lately I was thinking a lot about who I really was and who I wanted to be even though I felt quite comfortable with who I was at that point – which doesn't mean that I was happy and it also doesn't mean that I didn't want to change something...

That's what I told Niko a few moments later, but I didn't go into detail. After telling him that I felt comfortable with who I was I answered his first question. Again, I tried to not tell him too much about me. For two reasons: I wanted to protect myself from being hurt because of an almost stranger knowing private information about me and I didn't want him to think weird things about me because of that information.

So I tried to keep it facile by saying: „If you are quite good at almost every thing you do, not only random people, your friends and your family will have high expectations at you, but also you yourself. Long story short: I've always made and still make myself a lot of pressure and can't cope with failing."

I guess, you can really say that I tried. I hid the information about me hustling every day and night without a break for years but I told him my biggest weakness. I couldn't cope with failing. It didn't have to be a big fail, being one minute late was horrible, but not understanding one single correlation was enough to make me cry. It even made me have sleepless nights!

Sofia, can you just for once stop giving a stranger private information about you? When you talk about your most private information and your biggest weaknesses with every stranger as if it was just the weather, you don't have to be surprised when people hurt you with exactly that knowledge, I criticized myself after thinking about what I had told the man sitting in front of me.

Now you can just hope that he doesn't respond to that for now and that you'll never fight with him. Then maybe you both can forget about what you've told him and you won't suffer from you being a babble bag in the future.

My gaze wandered from Niko to my glass of water that I had emptied again while talking to Tommi's friend. Tommi's gaze followed mine and I hoped that he'd stop thinking about what I had said before by seeing my empty glass. As if he had read my thoughts, he asked my if I wanted another drink.

„Another water would be nice, I guess", I answered still looking at my glass of water that I now hold between both of my hands. „A water? Sofia, it's my birthday. Don't you want to celebrate that with a beer or maybe a wine, for my sake?", Niko asked and I could see his begging look from the corner of my eye.

I usually didn't drink alcohol – actually, this would be the second time in my life – but I couldn't resist his gaze even though I didn't understand why it seemed to be important to him. He didn't know my anyway, so why would he want to toast his birthday with me? So, I sighed and answered „Fine, one beer." That will be a funny evening. Especially for everyone else...

After the waiter gave us the two beer Niko had ordered, we continued our conversation. Luckily, Niko didn't come back to what I've said but gave me the opportunity to start a new topic.

„So, now that you know a lot about me, what about telling me a bit more about you? At this point I know that your first name is Niko, that today is your birthday and that you and Joel do the vocals. But that's everything I know."

I smiled while saying that. In my opinion, it was a bit weird that he knew so much about me, even things that only a few people knew and that I never wanted to tell him and at the same time, I had almost no idea of who the man was that sat in front of me wearing a black ripped jeans with a leather jacket.

„Well, there is a lot that I could tell you. But what do you wanna know about me?", he asked me back. „Umm.. Good question. What about your hobbies, when and why you joined the band, how you got to know Tommi?" „Of course I can tell you about that. So, the first question was about my hobbies, right? What a cliché question", he laughed a little.

He was right, that question is probably one of the first question when you meet someone new but I hadn't asked it because of that because I was really interested in him. He was one of my best friend's friends and I wanted to know more about the people Tommi spent a lot of time with. There's nothing reprehensible about it, isn't it?

„I don't have lots of hobbies. I guess you could count making music with the boys as one. Actually, spending time with them could be my biggest hobby. Making music, simply talking or being crazy as well as what we do now: Drinking liquor and habing fun", he grinned before he continued. „ Joel, Tommi, Joonas, Olli and I formed the band a few years ago, 2013 to be exact, so I didn't join later. I'm sharing the vocal part in our band with Joel. We share the sinning, additionally I rap and sometimes also scream."

I nodded interested. I actually hadn't even known that apart from the last member – what was his name again? – everyone was a member from the beginning. Before I could answer something or ask a new question, Niko asked me something. „Do you have other questions? Or is the interview finished?". Do I really act as if I wanted to interview him? Sofia, you're so embarrassing!

As I saw the grin on his face, I realized with relief, that if I really sounded like an interviewer, Niko at least didn't took it serious. I started to giggle and ended up laughing loudly. Oh now, there's the first effect of the beer. If you'd drink more often, you probably wouldn't react that sensitive to that bit of alcohol. But hopefully you won't end up looking pathetic in Niko's eyes...

A/n: Oh no... How do you think will the evening go on for possibly drunk Sofia?