Into The Deep End - A Roman Reigns Story

29

I suggest listening to 'I Hate This Part' by the Pussycat Dolls while reading the latter part of this chapter.

The distant humming sound was the first thing that registered in Sasha's mind as she drifted back to consciousness. The second thing was she was alone in the bed. She sat upright, slightly disoriented by the invasive noise as she tried to gauge her surroundings. Sunrays infiltrated the floor-to-ceiling glass windows inside the bedroom, indicating it was morning. Her head felt woozy and heavy from lack of sleep, having spent the night thinking about what Joe had said. And each time she did, her heart hurt even more.

The noise did not go away. Climbing out of the bed, she went in search of the racket, vaguely wondering where her boyfriend was. She followed the sound to the kitchen, stopping short when she saw Joe walking around the kitchen island, pushing a vacuum around as he cleaned up the shattered remnants of the Jack Daniels bottle from last night. It all came back to her. The big blow up at his parents' home; his meltdown in the kitchen and the heartbreaking story he told her. He had showered and changed so he looked better and rested, but it didn't stop Sasha from wondering if he had gotten any sleep.

Seeing her approaching, Joe quickly put his hand out. Sasha could see his mouth moving, forming words as he tried to get his message across over the drone of the vacuum. Shaking her head, she gestured at both her ears, and Joe rolled his eyes with a small grin before turning the machine off. "I was saying stay put, don't come any closer," he said, "Your feet are bare and there's glass all over the place."

Sasha grinned. "You must think I've got Dumbo's ears if you expected me to hear you with all that racket."

Joe pointed at the front door. "I got your stuff out of the car so you can get changed. Unfortunately there's no food in the house but we can pick up breakfast on the way to the airport."

"Sure." She leaned against the wall across from him, watching him vacuum until he was finished. "I should have been the one cleaning that up," she said, "I made that mess."

"Well, I'm the reason you made the mess, so..." he trailed off and shrugged, focusing on putting the vacuum away. Uncomfortable with the awkward silence, Sasha crossed her arms over her chest and walked slowly around the open living space, taking in the new environment. "I take it this is another house of yours?" It was considerably smaller than his Tampa home but it had the same open airiness, made more conspicuous by the shortage of furniture in the living room area, as well as the floor-to-ceiling windows that made up the walls of the house.

"Yeah. This is where I come when I want to relax and get away from everyone. It's my refuge, my little sanctuary from the madness of traveling and work." Joe gazed at her. "Would you believe me if I told you you're the very first person I've brought here?"

Sasha was surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah. And I've had it for two years now. Only a handful of people know about this place. Matt who found it for me, my dad and mom. It's very private, almost a secret. And when I come I'm always alone." With a quick shake of his head, he turned away, raking his fingers through his loose hair. "Last night was definitely not how I wanted you to see it for the first time though," he mumbled.

Again, uneasy silence settled between them as the ghost of the night before finally made its appearance. Sasha brushed her hands nervously down her skirt and looked up again, catching Joe's stare. "You didn't get much sleep, did you?" she asked.

"Not really," he admitted, his smile wry. "You?"

"Not really." She saw him differently now – as someone who had something very valuable stolen from him by someone he trusted – maybe someone he should never have trusted – and would have to live with that fact for the rest of his life. Thinking back, she realized just how many things suddenly made sense. The wistful looks he would give Mia, or infants they came across...even their casual talks about him having children of his own in the future, the longing that filled his eyes before he cleverly diverted to another subject...she had thought nothing of them until last night. There was no longer any doubt that Joe wanted children. And with that in mind, things suddenly became just that more complex for her. "Joe...what you told me...I couldn't stop thinking about it. I never imagined that was what happened. I never realized anyone was even capable of doing something like that. I'm so sorry."